LORI, DUB & THE PIG!

I have this step-daughter, Lori - who lives in Middle-Of-Nowhere, Georgia. She, her husband M, son Dub (11) and daughter Gee (5) have a little semi-farm. M owns an insurance/tax business to pay all the expenses for this little farming venture!

Not a day goes by that there isn’t some new adventure (could be interpreted as CRISIS)! On this chunk of land they are raising wild turkeys, several varieties of chickens, guinea hens, wild boar, domestic hogs, goats - both standards and pygmies and rabbits. Of course, there is the usual dog and uncountable cats!

Friday’s adventure (CRISIS) involves killing and dressing a hog for a "pig pickin" on Sunday. Lori and Dub will be the only characters directly involved. Gee will be ‘stupidvising’ from the sidelines and my hubby will be assisting by phone.

Keep in mind that Lori is a petite 5'2" (in heels) and might weigh 100. She’s tiny, but will get a job done when she sets her mind to it.

Phone call #1 - Daddy, how do I kill this pig? Just shoot it between the eyes, then cut its throat and use the wench to hang it from the tree limb. OK - bye!

Phone call #2 - Daddy, Dub shot it and cut its throat. Then we got it hanging okay. I think we want to scrape it instead of skinning it - what’s the easiest way to scrape it. (Gee in the background can be heard begging to help scrape.) Pour hot water all over it and just start to scrape. If it gets real cool and harder to work with, use more hot water. Ok - bye!

Phone call #3 - Daddy, we cut it open! I think I missed a step somewhere . . . I got pig poop all over the place. We went ahead and got everything out and washed it out really carefully! How do I NOT do that again? (I will not go into Daddy’s explanation of this - let’s just say he taught her preventive measures.) Well, it’s not like I’m gonna make chitlins’s (Southern for chitterlings) or anything. Bye!

Phone calls #4, 5 & 6 - All involve various stages of pig dismemberment - I did my best not to listen. At one point Gee had the garden limb cutters asking if she could help!

Phone call #7 - Surprise, this time it’s M - he’s on his way home from work and has just found out that his wife and children have been enjoying a evening of pig anatomy!

Phone call #8 - We have started answering the phone "Butcher’s Helper" - Daddy, we got SEVENTY POUNDS out of that pig! We didn’t even save all the fat and everything for sausage! I had no idea it was that heavy!

Ah! The leisure life on a gentleman’s farm!

UPDATE! Lori just called again . . . yep, one of the goats is giving birth! Right Now! She'll call us back with progress reports!

Get The Celebrating Going!

Just Do It Day - Don't hesitate, don't procrastinate - jump in there with both feet and JUST DO IT!

Eskimo Pie - I do LOVE an Eskimo Pie

National Speak Up and Succeed Day - Not sure I have the energy for this today, but if the opportunity presents itself, I'll JUST DO IT!