Bakerella and The Pioneer Woman Really Don't Need To Worry About Me Taking Their Place!!

For those of you who have been keeping up with Bakerella and The Pioneer Woman in the quest for the perfect Cake Pop - Cake Bites - and other yummy and beautiful Cake Creations, you may want to stop reading. This may damage your chances of perfecting your caking skills.

For those of you who have NOT been watching Bakerella and The Pioneer Woman, shame on you. They remind me a little of Lucy and Ethel . . . the funny part, not the stupid part! If you need addresses here they are: thepioneerwoman.com then click on 'cooking' at the top and browse around. You'll find the cake pops eventually. And bakerella.blogspot.com the inventor of the Cake Pop and Cake Bites.

Okay - so here's what has happened in my kitchen today. Somehow or other, it entered my mind to make a carrot cake today. As anyone who knows me will gladly tell you, I am way beyond challenged in the kitchen. Me baking a cake is highly unusual. Therefore, family and friends will not be surprised at the outcome.

I prepared the mix precisely as directed on the package. Poured it into my rarely used Wilton Bundt Pan, set the timer and got her to cooking. When the timer went off, I inserted a bamboo skewer to make sure it was done. Yep, clean! The cake is done!!

I set it on a cake rack to cool and set the timer for 10 minutes. During those 10 minutes, I was Little Susie Homemaker! I washed all my little cake making utensils, put away the mixer, etc. Man, maybe at almost 62 years old, I was finally getting the hang of this kitchen thing!

The timer goes off!! Yippee! I got a clean cooling rack, laid it on top of the bundt pan and flipped the whole thing over.

I immediately felt weight shift onto the cooling rack and felt my chest fill with pride. I carefully started to lift the bundt pan. Uh-oh! It's feeling a little heavier than it should. I set it back down, got a flashlight and peeked under the edge. Yep, the cake was on the cooling rack - NOT stuck in the pan.

I went ahead and lifted the bundt pan off. Great! About the top 1/3 of the cake is still in the top of the dang pan. Okay, I'll just carefully nudge it out and use the icing to 'glue' it on. Sure, like that cake is really gonna cooperate with me. Like that's ever gonna happen in my kitchen.

The instant that I touch the cake remaining in the pan, ALL the cake remaining in the pan reduces itself to crumbs. So much for glue.

Here's where things really get fun! I got out the canned icing. I put a big glob of icing in a huge bowl, I put the cake crumbs in the bowl and I put the big chunk of cake in the bowl because I have decided that I am Bakerella and Pioneer Woman all rolled into one. However; I forgot my Chef's hat and my cowgirl boots and my apron, too! At this point all that could have saved me would have been my Wonder Woman cape - and that's in the laundry!!

The cake balls didn't turn out too bad. I don't think. Maybe. Now for melting the Baker's Semi-Sweet Chocolate! or not. I had plenty of chocolate. I put it all in a nice deep Tupperware bowl and set it in the microwave. Two minutes later I checked it. It was still perfectly formed chocolate squares! So, I'm thinking (big mistake) that the chocolate should be starting to melt by now - and I put it back in for another two minutes!

The timer goes off, I open the microwave door and black smoke rolls out!!! And the odor!! Yep, ALL the chocolate is now burned - thoroughly, completely burned. In reading directions more carefully I have since found that the chocolate will retain the square shape and that you must stir, stir, stir! And heat the chocolate 30 seconds at a time, at least I think that's what it said.

I now have about a zillion cake balls on waxed paper sitting on my kitchen counter that Dixie is trying to find a way to get to. I have a headache. Dub is asking me where the carrot cake is. Where is my rum?
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