This IS The Fun Part!

Miscellaneous Whatevers

2010-09-16T14:11:00.003-04:00

Thank goodness we only have a couple more months of nasty political ads to endure before the November elections. I would love to know what each candidate proposes to DO. Instead - they are telling us why we shouldn't vote for their opponent. Many years ago I was told that if you spend too much time trying to put everyone down - you're just making yourself look small! I really wonder if each of these candidates just don't have anything good to say about themselves?!?!

Y'all should have been in our front yard about 3 o'clock this morning! We had the great armadillo attack. Somehow, Dixie and Rascal heard something outside that woke them up - and the barking competition began. Both fuzzy faced kids raced to the door and dang near removed it from the hinges before I could get there and get it open. I was sure there was no danger. Had it been a mass murderer, they would have been wagging their tails and dancing around like they were waiting for Santa! Anyhow - once out the door, they both zeroed in on that armored critter - in a total frenzy! The armadillo just rolled up in a ball and did nothing. The attack dogs went at it from every possible direction . . . . and got no results at all. The armored ball didn't move at all - the dogs barked, whined, pawed, tried to bite, sniffed and poked to no avail. I had to go into the house and get leashes to round up the dogs and drag them back into the house. Ah, yes - the leisurely, retired life in Florida!

Do you follow Pioneer Woman? I must admit that I have become addicted to her blog. From her discussions of Charlie the basset hound to her anguish over her children growing up too quickly, I find that I can relate to a lot of what she's going through. I must admit - I don't have a zillion acre cattle ranch, nor do I have the big bucks that obviously come along with said ranch - but somehow she still manages to get through to me. Maybe it's the chocolate!

I saw reports on the local news yesterday that crimes are down all over the place. Why, then, does it seem like there is nothing but crime and tragedy on the news day in and day out? Are we just too connected these days? Have things always been this bad . . . we just hear more about it?

GOOD NEWS OF THE DAY! A family had their 6 month old puppy disappear from their back yard seven years ago. They put up signs, ran an ad in the paper, called the animal shelters, etc. and never found the puppy. Last week, they received a call from a shelter over 400 miles away. A dog had come into the shelter - and the microchip in his shoulder led back to that family! The next morning, the family loaded up and went to pick up the missing family member - who by all accounts seems to remember them. No one knows where he has been for all this time, but he has settled in back home as if he had never been gone!

Oh How True!

2010-08-27T22:29:00.002-04:00

For those of us who have ever worked for anyone anywhere - - this little mantra is too true! I first saw it back in the 1960's and it has been in my head ever since. I have, from time to time, put it to paper and hung it near my desk at various jobs. Only one boss objected and demanded that I take it down. So I took it down - and kept it readily available to show to anyone nearby when he was not in the office. I felt it was my duty to share it with anyone I could - especially because he objected!

The Train

I'm not allowed to drive the train,
the whistle I can't blow

I'm not the one who designates
how far the train may go

I'm not allowed to blow off steam,
or even ring the bell

But let that damn train jump the tracks
and see who catches hell!

Your welcome!

I Voted Yesterday!

2010-08-26T17:54:00.002-04:00

I went yesterday to vote in our Flori-duh primary. Easily found a parking spot very close to the door. Walked straight in - no problem. Went right up to the gentleman who was dealing with people who had last names in the section of the alphabet where my name falls. I handed him my driver's license - because your voter registration card is not considered valid identification to use for voting (HUH??). He then loudly announced my complete name for everyone in the room to hear. Scanned through his three-ring binder until he found it - and then announced my complete street address! I quietly asked him if voter information was supposed to be private. He replied that it was - said he was sorry for being so loud and asked me to sign beside my name in his little book.

He took a sticker from beside my name and stuck it on a little blue piece of paper. He handed it to me along with my license and pointed to a woman on the other side of another table and said to take it to her. A walked a few steps and stopped to read this little paper. Name, address, party affiliation and a place for a signature.

My cane and I thumped across the wooden Moose Lodge dance floor to voting assistance person #2. A lovely lady who I handed my little blue piece of paper to. She read it and then asked for my license. The likelihood that I had just mugged someone and stolen their little blue paper was ZERO. There were two other voters in there at the time and about ten workers. But, I guess rules are rules - so I handed her my license. She very carefully compared the two and then asked me what my address was! HUH?? Okay, I told her my address. She then commented on what a lovely street I live on. She asked me to sign the little blue slip of paper. I hesitated for a moment while she smiled at me . . . and I smiled back. When it became a little awkward, I asked for the paper and a pen. Flustered, she handed me both, I signed and asked for my license. She told me that she needed to verify my signature.

She finally relinquished my license and reached beside her and got an empty file folder and her "assistant" checked my little blue slip - announcing to the world loudly what my party affiliation was - and got a ballot to put in the file folder. You know, to respect my privacy. I asked them what the point of the folder was if they were going to yell out my affiliation as they put my ballot in the folder. I then asked if they might change the way they handled these things in the future. They might just get in trouble for stomping all over other people's freedoms!

I took my ballot into my little shielded area and did my duty - voting for who I hoped and prayed would be the best choice from what I had learned over the past several months. Then I went thumping over to the ballot eating machine. This thing looks very much like an industrial strength shredder. And when you slide your ballot in, it certainly sounds as if that's what's happening inside.

With our record here in Flori-duh, it wouldn't surprise me in the least if the final step at the local Moose Lodge voting site is to just shred your ballot as you pick up your "I Voted" sticker at the door!

Don't get me wrong. America is the greatest! I have yet to see any other country that even comes close to being as wonderful! I'll gladly live with all my petty little complaints - I will still fly my flag - proudly sing the national anthem and defend her. But - one of my rights is freedom of speech - and I choose to use it today!

My Own Little Editorial

2010-06-12T17:28:00.003-04:00

At what point will they stop calling this Gulf of Mexico problem an "oil spill"? This is not an oil spill. It's an oil gusher run wild! I'm constantly amazed at the lack of organization and the total lack of concern by government and BP for the people and wildlife being damaged by all of this.

I agree that it's really important to figure out what happened. However, it's NOT important to figure it out until the flow of poison is stopped! The people who are supposed to be the best in the business are so busy appearing before congress, they don't have time to work on the problem. Yes, see if something can be done to prevent this from happening again . . . but let's wait until the flow has stopped and the worst of the damage has been mopped up. Let those guys go get their hands dirty cleaning up the mess they made.

There are thousands of people being damaged every minute. There are sea creatures dying by the truckload, there's vegetation dying that will never come back. How are you going to fix that? Can you run a Hoover over the beaches and just suck up all the globs of oil? Can you set up a super filter for the entire Gulf of Mexico, just like it was a huge swimming pool?

If everyone would stop making empty promises and empty threats - - and just get to the job at hand, the job will get done.

Hire all these unemployed people who depend on the Gulf for their living to help in one way or another with the clean up.

See to it that the equipment and technology are in place for the clean up. You would be amazed at how hard people will work to protect their homeland, if they know what to do and have the equipment to do it.

And quit paying all that money to show me ads on television about how bad you feel, BP! I don't care how bad you feel. Take that money and use it to stop that gusher!!

Dixie & Rascal

2010-05-29T00:37:00.004-04:00

Dixie and Rascal are the rat terriers who own Dub and I. They took over our home about 6 years ago . . . and things have never been the same since!

The rat terrier breed of fuzzy faced four-leggers look remarkably like Jack Russell Terriers, but are not directly related. The "Ratter" is much more calm and much less stubborn. They are very easy to train when it's something that they are interested in! Both of our Ratters have a huge vocabulary! When we're outside, they know the difference between "cat", "snake" and "lizard". In the house, if you ask for a toy, they each bring a stuffed animal. If you ask for a bone, they search the corners and bring you bones. When you say ball - they get bouncy balls!

Dixie is the leader of the pack! Poor Rascal is so afraid of getting in trouble with her that he won't go anywhere near her if she's got a bone (which is most of the time). It has gotten so bad that when it's bed time, Rascal will sit in the living room and whine softly until Dub or I come and escort him into the bedroom. Every time Dixie snaps at him, poor Rascal screams like a little girl! Wonder if he'll ever grow up enough to stand up to her and snap back? . . . .

Nope - that'll never happen!

Rascal loves his dog food - - he'll go for treats and snacks, but does well on the dog food we give them. On the other hand, Dixie will only eat the dog food if she is starving! She much prefers whatever Dub is eating. One of her favorites is asparagus. She also likes watermelon, green beans, any kind of pasta, meat, eggs, carrots, french fries and will sit up and beg for iced tea! I think she would eat rocks if Dub was eating them, too! I wonder if that's why her shape so closely resembles that of Miss Piggy?!

Crossing The Borders

2010-05-28T14:58:00.001-04:00

If you have not read the new Arizona law on illegal aliens, Google it - right now - and read it. It's only 17 pages. The first few pages deal with the actual issue itself. All the rest explains where the money from the fines will go and other miscellaneous details. The real meat is in the first few pages.

I have seen and read so much being said by so many "talking heads" that I just had to see exactly what this law said. From what I got out of it, all it does is reinforce the Federal laws that are already in place. It does NOT give police permission to stop you simply because you may look or sound foreign. However, if you are speeding and get stopped, they CAN ask for papers at that point and turn you over to the proper immigration authorities if you are in this country without legal authorization.

There are legal procedures for visiting the USA and for becoming a citizen here. Use them! Do it the right way. We welcome those who are willing to put in the effort to go through the proper steps to become a citizen. Sneaking in is not the way to do it.

It seems to me that illegals get here already knowing more about our welfare system than most Americans are aware of! They get subsidized housing, free medical care, free education for their children, free legal representation, free language lessons - all this from the government that I have been paying taxes to for my entire adult life and that won't give me anything for free!

Want to be welcomed by the citizens of America?

Get a sponsor

Apply for citizenship

Learn the language (at least try)

Don't complain because we do not all speak your language

Work on the books and pay taxes

When you break the law, don't complain that your arrest is because of your race

Please tell me what country I can move to where they will give me all of the benefits that illegals get here. When I call a government office I will be able to 'press 1' to talk to someone in my own language. And when I tell that government office that I'm illegal, they will ask me how they can help me!

I'll take a 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom cottage, on the beach, on the French Riviera, please!

Contratulations, Arizona - I like your style - and will be planning a vacation there soon!

Surprise!! I'm blogging again, maybe!

2010-05-27T13:07:00.004-04:00

Edgar and I have decided to give blogging another try! Maybe!

Yesterday I had some business at a Federal office in another town about an hour away. I had checked very carefully in all of my correspondence with this Federal agency to make sure that I had the time and address right. Also checked for any special rules . . . you know, like No Terrorists Allowed - stuff like that! There were NO rules specified - no dress codes, etc.

After our hour and a half cruise on the Interstate in rush-hour traffic, we arrived at the designated Federal office building. A little unimpressive office in a string of offices. Most of the others were attorneys, CPA's, etc. We're not talking about some huge Federal compound here.

Being country bumpkins, my husband and I took our little Case knives out of our jeans pockets and left them in the car. (Country folks don't go too far without a sharp knife in their pocket.) There were no signs on the door or wall saying what was or wasn't allowed either.

We entered the building and found a receptionists desk, 4 waiting room chairs and a water fountain. At the desk sat a security guard, right hand resting on the butt of his gun. Here's how the conversation went:

WHO ARE YOU?

I gave him my name and introduced my husband.

I signed in on the sheet he pointed to.

WHERE'S YOUR CELL PHONE?

I got my phone out of my purse and showed him.

TURN IT OFF!

I smiled and turned it off.

YOU PACKIN'? (he was looking at my husband for this one)

Not knowing what the guy was talking about, hubby told him that he had left his knife in the car.

STAY WHERE YOU ARE!

Huh?

YOU MENTIONED WEAPONS - DON'T MOVE - I HAVE TO SEARCH YOU BOTH FOR WEAPONS!

Okay.

At this point, he got out his magic wand and checked my husband. The wand started screaming as he was checking his back. As hubby tried to explain about the metal from a back surgery, Mr. Security Guard got more and more nervous! Hubby asked for permission to get a card out of his wallet that would explain why his back set the gizmo off. Once that issue was settled, it was my turn.

My body made it through the magic wand test . . . but when he dug through my purse, he found the contraband 10 ounce water bottle (half empty).

THAT'S ENOUGH TO BLOW UP THIS WHOLE BLOCK!

Huh?

PUT IT IN YOUR CAR.

Hubby was kind enough to take it out to the car - and Mr. Security Guard actually asked him if he had still left his knife in the car when he came back in!

My appointment time finally came - and the person I was meeting with commented that I had certainly given his guard a very exciting morning! Seems that he had been watching from a camera mounted in the reception/waiting room!

Even with our security issues, the meeting was a success and everything was settled in my favor.

I am so glad to know that Barney Fife found work since leaving Mayberry!

EDGAR AND I WON AN AWARD ! !

2009-12-03T11:58:00.004-05:00

Who could have ever guessed? How could we have possibly known? Edgar and I have won our very first ever blogging award from Steve (www.stevedeniesanywrongdoing.blogspot.com) just because we actually enjoy watching him go through his mail!

I'm not sure if that means that we are really wonderful people - or if we just have way too much time on our hands.

This is an honor we don't really deserve . . we take great pleasure in learning how to make Red Plum seem to be as exciting as winning a full year's supply of coffee filters!

Maybe I'll Get A Tattoo!

2009-11-02T08:55:00.004-05:00

I'm just about over some of these folks that I see walking around with tattoos from the top of their heads to their toes!

While dining in restaurants, I've lost my appetite because of a woman who had her face covered with what looked like a huge snake skin.

As you walk through the mall there are people who have almost no skin showing at all - because everything is covered in vile, bloody scenes of murder and mayhem.

Somehow the old fashioned heart with MOM written in it has been replaced by a pit bull with fangs dripping blood!

A curvy pinup girl in a one piece bathing suit has turned into a stark naked female flaunting everything she's got.

I think that this is one of the few tattoos that I have seen lately that I would encourage a gentleman to get! It makes me want to meet this guy and have him tell me a good joke.

What do you think?

Stellan Needs Prayers Again!

2009-10-28T20:43:00.003-04:00

Please

Pray

For

Stellan!!

Last night Stellan went back into SVT. Jennifer and PC couldn't stop it - the doctor said to get him to the hospital.

He's in the PICU - they intubated him for the first time ever - his kidney's aren't functioning well again - and everyone says this is the worst bout he's ever had.

He did finally come out of SVT, but things are still not right. They could all use some love and lots of prayers.

If you have the time, I know Jennifer would love to hear from anyone with some support. The hours do drag on when you're sitting in the hospital staring at a sick baby! Go to www.mycharmingkids.net and give her something to keep her mind busy.

I know she'll appreciate it!!

Can Sombody Explain This??

2009-08-26T18:45:00.003-04:00

I will admit it, I just don't understand what is going on up in Washington, D.C.!!

I thought I understood Mr. Obama to be campaigning for us who are the people of the United States of America. Not the huge conglomerates, Wall Street, auto manufacturers, etc. Just the people who live, love, laugh, cry, work and do our best to be good to one another here in the U.S. of A.

So - President Obama took office. Then the government bailed out financial institutes left and right. The government bailed out banks . . . who still refuse to loan us little folks money! The government bailed out car manufacturers. Then the government paid $4,500.00 for every gas guzzler that people traded in toward buying a new car with better gas mileage. If those people can afford a car payment, they probably aren't in too desperate a financial situation in the first place!

I know one woman who is very seriously considering suicide! Her failing health has forced her to leave her job. She has no health insurance. She is still fighting to qualify for Social Security Disability. It took 4 months for her to receive food stamps. She gets $123.00 a month! Try feeding yourself on $123.00 for a month. At the rate she is going, her savings will run out in seven months. If her SSD does not come through, she will have NO money. There is no immediate family. She was told that her food stamps will increase to $235.00 a month. That's great . . . but with no other income, she cannot pay her power bill, a phone bill, water, etc. She already turned off her cable, gave up her Internet connection (goes to the library and uses their computers), gave away her dog and her cat, takes cold showers - - has done everything to cut costs.

She sees absolutely no way around suicide. How do you tell her that it's going to be okay, because Ford sold so many cars during the Cash for Clunkers campaign? She lives in Washington state. I have contacted a church near her. They have already visited her and are going to work with her. One of their members happens to be an attorney and has promised to handle her SSD case pro bono . . . and he is also going to work as her advocate to attempt to get her any and ALL assistance that she qualifies for.

Had we not "bumped into" one another on the Internet, what might have happened with her? She's 47 years old, alone, not heavily educated, panic stricken and felt that she had absolutely no option open to her. Everywhere she went she was told no, you don't qualify.

She was the "people" that I thought President Obama was campaigning to help. So far all I've seen is huge companies get huge bail-outs and support. The already wealthy executives who led these huge corporations into financial downfall are receiving amazing bonuses! For jobs particularly NOT well done.

I just read in the paper that our older generation will not see a cost of living raise in their Social Security checks this year. First time this has happened since some time in the 1930's! Everything that these people have to pay for has increased in price. And now for most of them, their Social Security money received will actually be less than the year before. Why less? Because most of them are paying for the Part D Prescription coverage that is deducted directly from Social Security before the check is issued - - which is certainly going to increase again this year, just like it has every year!

So, what we're ending up with is our elderly population, who are barely scraping by will be getting LESS "take home pay" . . . yep, the little old ladies who often have to choose between food or their heart medication . . . . while their power bill, water bill, prescriptions, food, clothing, and everything else they NEED increases in price on a daily basis.

Something is wrong with this picture!!

Things are getting out of hand!!

2009-08-22T15:55:00.003-04:00

Okay, I understand all the politically correct stuff. I don't like a lot of it, but at least I understand it. But someone please explain to me why, oh why, is the press going nuts over the fact that Mrs. Obama wore a pair of shorts to visit a national park?

They weren't super tight, show it all shorts. They really looked good on her. And she's really got the legs for it, too.

It's not like she wore shorts to a state dinner or something inappropriate. She was on vacation with her husband and kids - going to see the sights.

What's she supposed to do? Dress up for every occasion?

Nope. She was properly dressed for the function. And besides, who does she have to please? I just don't see anything wrong with wearing something comfortable - especially if your legs look as good as hers!

I can't imagine what will happen the first time the press finds out that she actually wore a bathing suit to go swimming!

The end.

CRISIS At Grammaw Central!

2009-08-01T18:12:00.007-04:00

I just got a phone call from "The Pickle" - better known as my wonderful Grandson! (The blond shown here.)

The first words out of his mouth were, "I've got some bad news".

As a mother I was a worrier . . as a grandmother, I'm much, much worse because I'm over 300 miles away.

So, before asking what was wrong, my brain starts running through all the horrible things that could possibly be wrong. He's a really great kid, so I know he's not in any serious trouble. I just talked to my son two days ago, so it's something really recent. It's summer so it's can't be bad grades - he's an honor student, anyway! Okay, I eliminated the impossibles.

The possibles . . . His sister injured herself cheer leading. Nope, mom or dad would have called about that. He got a snake bite. He's a cross country runner - and he broke his leg! Or his foot! He was in the pool and his hair turned green! No, he sounded way too serious for that!

He broke his left arm! With 2 weeks of summer vacation left, he broke his arm!

So when you get your cast, Pickle, what's it gonna be? Nice, simple, red?

Kind of preppy - green with the blue stripes?

I guess it could be so much worse . . . what if they had to put a cast on your head???

Get well soon! ! ! Love, Grammaw & Grampaw

Sore Back? This will scare you!!

2009-07-26T17:23:00.004-04:00

Hi there! I've been busy lately. My poor little blog has suffered terribly and I am so sorry to have neglected it for so long.

I made the mistake of volunteering my skills (or lack thereof) to a web site used by the group dedicated to Adhesive Arachnoiditis - which is what Dub suffers from. This back condition is almost always caused by an invasive procedure by doctors. I guess the easiest way to describe it is to say that when the outer covering of the spine is damaged, this produces scar tissue. In some cases that scar tissue becomes very sticky and huge, it invades the spinal column and causes nerve "clumping".

Once the scar tissue starts growing and sticking to the nerves, the patient has tremendous, unending pain. It goes all day and all night. You have bad days and then you have worse days. The nerve pain is accompanied by a burning sensation in your feet - or for some people it feels like they are walking on broken glass. Very frequently one or both legs develop numbness. Sometimes just the thigh, sometimes the entire leg.

There are a lot of other problems associated with Adhesive Arachnoiditis. We have about 2,500 that belong to the on-line group. It seems like every one of them has different problems. Some can function pretty well, like Dub. Some are bed-ridden. Some are in wheel chairs.

Diagnosis is tough. It usually takes an MRI with contrast dye and an expert radiologist to spot it. Most doctors will first tell you that it's all in your head. Your surgery was a success and everything is fine. Your x-ray looks great. Once you have that "AA" diagnosis, Social Security Disability is pretty easy to get. It's one of the major disabilities on their "list".

For pain relief I've heard of everything from acupuncture to implanted morphine pumps and everything in between. I know of people who do well on very mild prescription pain killers and there are a lot who never get any relief even from their morphine pumps. Dub is one of the lucky ones who get pretty good relief on a minimum of prescriptions.

This can't be operated on. If you have surgery and they remove the scar tissue, it grows back - bigger and badder! There is no cure. There is no fix. We have a young man in our on-line group who is 21 years old. His mother joined when he was only 7! We've all kind of 'watched' Little Andrew grow up with this affliction. For almost 14 years his mom has been looking for a way to fix it!

We actually have two sites. One for information - where we try to keep up with all the latest research. The other is just about all posting back and forth about what works for each . . . and what doesn't.

Ladies - - this is for YOU! Birthing epidurals are a major cause of this problem among women. If that needle is off just a tiny fraction, you, too could end up with this! Discuss it with your doctor before having that epidural.

Dub and I had never heard of this until a year after his one and only back surgery. We got out all those release/consent papers that were signed and looked them over very carefully. Yes, it's in there! We are told by the "experts" that there's only about a 5% chance of having this happen.

So, please be aware. If you are having any procedures done that involve your neck, back, spine or anything close to any of those - ask your doctor about Adhesive Arachnoiditis. It will at least put him/her on notice that you know it exists. An old British study showed the 87% of cases were caused by physician errors!

* * * * * * * *

And for more of a downer . . . Stellan is back in the hospital. According to the last tweet from McKMama he is not responding well at all. The SVT is not going away and he is in rough shape. . . . GET THOSE PRAYERS GOING ! !

Not Me! Monday

2009-07-13T12:09:00.003-04:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

In hindsight, I have just realized that I did NOT put my life in danger this morning. When taking the rat terriers out with me to get the morning paper, I failed to notice the HUGE pit bull wandering up our street. As Rascal (fur standing straight up, barking like mad) headed toward the pit bull, I did not rush in their direction with only the Monday edition of Florida Today for protection! Just as the dogs were nose-to-nose (with NO tail wagging), the pit bull owner drove around the corner, jumped from his car and grabbed his collar. Whew, I was afraid Rascal was gonna hurt that poor pit bull!

I have NOT hit a total case of "writers' block" and will now close this pitiful attempt of blogging for today! I DO hope that my next attempt will be at least a little more entertaining.

What's So Special About Tomorrow??

2009-07-07T17:21:00.004-04:00

AT 5 MINUTES AND 6 SECONDS AFTER 4 O'CLOCK, ON THE 8TH OF JULY, THIS YEAR, THE TIME AND DATE WILL BE:

04:05:06 07-08-09!!

It will happen once in the morning . . . and once in the afternoon.

THIS WILL NOT HAPPEN AGAIN UNTIL THE YEAR 3009!!!

(I had a feeling that you just needed to know this - didn't want you to wait 1000 years for someone else to tell you about it.)

And, I must also add that it is the birthday of one of my very favorite people EVER! Happy Birthday, Karen! You're the best daughter I could have ever picked!

Not Me! Monday

2009-07-06T10:41:00.004-04:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I did not wish horrible, terrible, awful things to happen to one of my across the street neighbors this weekend. Never did. Never would. He did NOT park a full tractor-trailer across the street from our house on Friday evening and leave it there until 3 o'clock this morning! About every 30 minutes, the generator did NOT kick on to run the reefer and keep his load cold.

Therefore, while trying to enjoy cooking ribs on the grill we WEREN'T surrounded by the wonder odor of diesel exhaust! And while trying to enjoy splashing in the pool we were not choking on the same diesel exhaust fumes!

And we didn't have to finally move inside to enjoy our watermelon! How can you have a watermelon seed spitting contest inside??!!

It is NOT 11am. I am NOT still in my jammies. I am NOT sitting in the nice, cool A/C while Dub is outside mowing the lawn! And I do NOT intend to change any of those items any time soon . . . . well, okay - I AM going to go shower and get dressed.

Happy Monday!!

Not Me! Monday - Free Therapy

2009-06-29T14:47:00.003-04:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Nobody in this house spent two full days in her jammies this week. Nope, not sick. Nothing wrong. Just absolute pure-tee laziness! There is no one in this house that would do that!

And then that very same nobody could never have gone outside early this morning and pulled weeds, dug dirt, picked about a ton of tomatos and egg plants, chased two rat terriers, filled the bird bath, trimmed the fig bush and then came in the house to figure out that she couldn't have possibly forgotten all about writing her Not me! Monday post!! No respectable blogger could or would ever do that!

Dub did NOT decide that the blades on our cute little green and yellow riding mower needed sharpening. And he sure didn't proceed to lift said little mower by himself so he could get a jack stand under it. For those of you unaware - he has a horrible, inoperable back condition that is aggravated by doing things like that - and here he is doing heavy lifting. Like his doctors have NOT limited him to picking up nothing weighing more than 8 pounds! Oh no - nothing like that ever happens around here.

And, of course, I did not throw a complete - perfect hissy fit in his direction for this crime. We don't have every tool known to man around here. We have two floor jacks! And he really didn't stick his head in the door and ask if I could help him for a minute! NO!

Then Dub didn't spend the next day in bed with his pain medication wondering why his back was killing him! Please tell me that he didn't actually say, "I don't know what the hell I did, but I'm hurtin' so much worse than usual!"

If you haven't done any "Not Me's" - how about leaving a couple in my comments! I just love knowing I'm not alone in my imperfections!

Someone Help Me!

2009-06-17T12:31:00.006-04:00

If you read my Not Me! Monday!, you know that I've been having some issues with sleeping in lately.

What I failed to mention is that on that very Monday - my brother-in-law was BEATING (not knocking) on our front door at 7:15am. Yes, a damn m!

This man has no conscience. He is retired, like us - but he is one of those who gets up really early every morning! And he doesn't understand why the rest of the world isn't up and fully functioning before 7 every morning!

There is no way to count the number of times I have told him not to call so early in the morning . . . I have told him not to come beating on the door so early in the morning. He just laughs and says it doesn't hurt us to get up early and be productive from time to time.

I agree with him completely . . . only if it were "from time to time". He is not bothered by the fact that everyone else that has our number seems to feel exactly the same way.

This morning at 9:00 - - - it was granddaughter G from Middleofnowhere, GA to let us know that she was at the salon. She was using her Mom's cell so she could tell us Mom was getting a hair cut - and that her 5 year old little toes were getting a pedicure! Someone help me!!

Her godfather gave her several gift certificates for salon services for Christmas. Yes, this is the same man who gave her the miniature bull for her birthday! Bear is now about as tall as a great dane but much, much wider!

It's time for my nap now.

Not Me! Monday!

2009-06-15T10:41:00.003-04:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I'm taking a little liberty with my Not Me! Monday! today. I'm going to tell on other people. There is a theme to this. Let's call it "Who woke them up this morning?" Dub and I are retired - we love to sleep in - our family and friends know we love to sleep in. This is how our valiant efforts to sleep in were squashed last week!

Monday - The Yellow Book did NOT have their computer call us at 8:30am to make sure that we received our recent phone book delivery

Tuesday - No way that Dub's son "C" called us at 7:15 am just to say hi! At 7:15 dang am!???

Wednesday - L couldn't wait to call from Middleofnowhere, GA to tell us about the new baby bunnies. Oh, no - had to call at 8:30 and actually say, "Sorry to wake you guys up, but we've got SIX new bunnies!" Happy, happy, joy, joy!

Thursday - Mastercard did not call me at 9am just to see if I was a happy customer. We won't even discuss the fact that I had already told them twice that I wanted to be put on their 'do not call' list -- because I was becoming an unhappy customer -- because they kept calling me!

Friday - Because of a serious case of short term memory loss, Dub's son "C" forgot that he had already done his duty of awaking us EARLY Tuesday! No - I guess this was different - he really didn't call at 7:15am. He called about 8am. No - he couldn't have done that twice in one week!

Saturday - We actually shot ourselves in the foot! Set our alarm for 7am....just had to get up in time to rush out to the front yard and watch the shuttle launch! Got up, turned on the TV for the latest shuttle update - - AND IT DIDN'T LAUNCH!

Sunday - Dixie and Rascal detected a major disturbance in the neighborhood - and couldn't have started a bark-fest about 7:45am. Oh, no - they didn't fight to see who was gonna get out the door first . . . and as soon as they were both outside, they looked around - did what needed to be done and came back inside. They both immediately stretch out and went back to sleep. Dub and I however NEVER got back to sleep!

And how was your week??

I'm Just The Stupidvisor!

2009-06-10T15:39:00.002-04:00

Yesterday Dub decided that the starter on our little bitty riding mower needed to be taken completely apart and repaired. I had to agree with him. It was getting harder and harder to get the poor thing to crank up.

He moved the Jeep out of the carport, rolled the mower in and started dismantling the defenseless mower. Of course, as with all things mechanical -- -- you must first remove about twenty-seven other things before you can get to the item you are actually headed for!

Finally, he removes the starter. Now for the complete dis-assembly of the starter. Did you know there's several little tiny springs inside a starter? Yep!! Well, there WERE several little tiny springs. A few of them went flying out into the gravel/sand next to the carport as the starter was coming apart.

As I was combing through the gravel/sand with my lousy eyes and a long handled magnet trying to find the fleeing springs, Dub continued to dis-assemble the rest of the starter and figure out what the problem was.

Once the air in the vicinity turned blue from the language being aimed at this starter AND the mother of this starter - - - it was determined that I should drive to Bruce's Mower and pick up a new starter.

So - from start to finish, four and a half hours and $100 later, we have a new starter on our cute little riding mower! And I think it starts just great!

And Dub decides that the solenoid just doesn't sound right. So - this morning he had to begin the entire process again! Except this time, I did not participate as stupidvisor. When he ascertained that said solenoid was not going to cooperate, HE went to Bruce's Mower and only had to spend $14 to replace that.

He has now decided that the cute little yellow and green riding mower is running just great! But the Weedeater is sounding a little off!

Not Me! Monday - Again? So Soon?

2009-06-08T00:17:00.001-04:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I'm getting sick and tired of having to tell you about our neighborhood cats NOT getting into our pool enclosure in the middle of the night. And having to erase the picture in my brain of Dub in his Bart Simpson boxers out there trying to chase them out. And, NO, our two rat terriers would never set up such a ruckus that the next door neighbor came outside to make sure everything was okay! Stupid damn cats!

We didn't have such a bad thunderstorm again yesterday that Dixie tried to actually get under the couch! No - she has no anxieties at all! I wonder how expensive it is to take a rat terrier to a shrink?

Dub's daughter L certainly did not call us last night from Middleofnowhere, Georgia to announce the birth of about SIXTEEN new little piggies! I do not belong to a family that owns a mini pig farm!! No way - no how - never - ever!

Not Me! Monday

2009-06-01T11:50:00.002-04:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

It was not me who got this great recipe off of Pioneer Woman - and did NOT make this really easy apple/puff pastry dessert yummy goody last night.

And Dub and I are certainly not the ones who have eaten almost every last crumb of that apple/puff pastry dessert already!

It is NOT almost noon - and I am for sure not still in my nightie! I'm sure that I must have gotten up bright eyed and bushy tailed - showered and dressed for the day - bright and early! SURE I DID!!

During a thunderstorm last week, Dixie did not get so frightened that she abandoned her usual hiding place (under the toilet) - and crawled under our bed! I did NOT have to hold up the end of the bed while Dub pulled her out when we finally found her. She did not get stuck so tightly that she couldn't get her big, fat self back out from under that bed! Bless her little heart!

So - is there anything that you didn't do??

The Tale of Stack O' Dollah

2009-05-27T18:55:00.003-04:00

Many years ago I worked in the tax accounting department of a large manufacturing company. There were about 8 to 10 of us in the department. One of my work-mates, Lynda, was black. And she felt that it was her God given duty to educate all of us "white breads" (that was her term for us) on the ways of the streets!

Please do not misunderstand. Lynda was an absolute riot to work with. She was really, really good at her job - but also really, really funny. And she took great pleasure in making fun of us white folks not understanding what was going on the world outside. As each new slang word was invented, she made sure we knew what it meant. You know, in case we got stranded out in the streets, we'd be able to take care of ourselves!

One morning, Lynda called in and said she was going to be late. Boy, we could hardly wait! She was never late for work. We just knew there was going to be a story behind this. And was there ever!

The night before, her brother, Stack O' Dollah, had been arrested. Seems that one of his employees had not been performing as expected and he had slapped her around. I guess when you're a pimp, that's just one of the many duties you must take on!

Anyway, Lynda had been out half the night going to friends and relatives to get up the money to make bail for Stack. She did manage to get him bailed out at about 4am. But that's not why she was late - - oh no - she said she could have made it to work okay.

Why was she late?

Her momma made her go first thing that morning down to the newspaper office and wait for the late edition of the paper to come out. Why? Well, she had to buy 20 copies of the late edition because it had a big picture of Stack O' Dollah right on the front page - and a story, too - all about him being arrested and all. Momma wanted to make sure she had plenty to mail to the rest of the family that lived up north!

True story.

Bragging Grandparents - Again!!

2009-05-26T22:40:00.005-04:00

My grandson, Pickle, has outdone himself this year with awards!!

Not only did he win a Science Award and the Headmasters Honor Roll Award - but he was also inducted into the National Junior Honor Society!!

This is really, really exciting, Pickle - because we know how hard you work to get these great grades! Congratulations!

Holy Cow, Pickle - WHAT A GREAT JOB!!

Your Grampaw & I are so very proud of you!

Now I know why I blog - so I can brag about my fabulous kiddos!!

Miscellaneous Whatevers

2009-05-20T20:26:00.004-04:00

My random thoughts - just a little of this and that - and whatever!

We've been so very dry here on the Space Coast. About 10 inches short on rain for the year. Well, Mother Nature has made up for that in the past few days. On Monday, Tuesday and today we have had at least 3 inches of rain each day -- that's 9 inches this week! And it's still raining! I shouldn't complain; this is really helping with the 100+ wild fires that were burning all over the state last week . . . it's refilling all the swamps . . . and it will really help our local mosquito population maintain the record size we're used to! Not just quantity - but each bug is about the size of an adult Blue Jay!!

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Dub and I cleaned out the kitchen closet this week! Think gigantic junk drawer. Miscellaneous 'stuff' has been entering that closet for over 10 years - and nothing has ever been removed. We had 8,467 plastic grocery bags that we took to recycle. We had every old plumbing or electric part ever replaced in this house. Why did we save them?? If we replaced them, logic would say they don't work - so as I'm dropping each into the trash can, Dub is asking, "Are you sure we don't need that?" There were enough various screws, nails, nuts, bolts, etc. to build three houses, a truck and maybe half of a really nice gazebo. I did keep them - but they are all in one big container! Who knew we had 4 cans of WD-40?? And you can never have enough caulk - is 5 tubes enough? There's rope, string, twine, tie-wraps and 4 different kinds of tape! We don't need all that - 1 roll of duct tape is all anyone needs to hold anything together! Well, it's done - and there's now room for a family of three to live in there. But they better hurry before Dub starts putting 'stuff' in there again!

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Wise words from my grandmother: If money can fix it, it's NOT a problem.

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Poor rat terrier Dixie is terrified of thunder and lightning. Rain - she just hates. So, this afternoon during a lull in the storming I had to get her leash, go into my bathroom, pull her out from under the toilet, drag her through the house. Then I had the pleasure of towing her out the door, down the steps and into the soggy front yard. The "Princess" just can't stand to get her delicate little toes wet. So, I drag her out to the middle of the front yard and tell her to "go pee". Which she immediately does.

Now you would think that when I took off the leash she'd hightail it back into the house, right? Nope. Dixie, little delicate thing she is - who won't get her tootsies wet without a fight - takes off for the nearest, deepest mud puddle! And she runs, splashes, barks, rolls, jumps and just generally has herself a really good time . . . until it starts to rain a little bit. Then she stops in her tracks, lays her ears back, looks around - - yelps, RUNS back into the house and returns to her hiding place under the toilet! Yes, she also hated the bath I gave her immediately thereafter.

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It is now officially okay for Memorial Day to arrive. I have purchased a watermelon. I think it's officially against the law (or should be) to have Memorial Day without a nice, big watermelon! And, speaking of Memorial Day - Don't forget to thank a member of the armed forces for all that they do for us! And don't forget to thank their family members, too!

Have a great Thursday!!

Not Me! Monday .. .. .. We're Ba-ack!

2009-05-18T00:15:00.000-04:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

It's good to be getting sort of back to normal - Not me Monday - is ever so much cheaper than therapy. It's also cheaper than throwing dishes! Give it a try; you'll be amazed at how good it feels!

We did NOT have a complete repeat of an earlier Not me! this week. Oh, no - not at this house. It's 3am . . . . two rat terriers go completely nuts . . barking . . screaming . . running in circles . . if they could speak they would be saying, "Help, they're coming to kill us all!!!" Dub and I react with little enthusiasm and lots of dirty words. Dixie and Rascal absolutely insist that there are dastardly deeds being done in the back yard. Who are we to argue? We open the back door and all hell does NOT break loose - AGAIN!! You would think that dang neighborhood cat would remember something as big as a swimming pool - - NOPE - the dogs frightened him right into the pool! Dub's ready to use the skimmer to push him under - I'm trying to get the dogs inside - and two of our neighbors DO NOT come out in their yards to watch out little three ring circus (they could have at least offered to share their beer)!!! Eventually we got the very wet cat out of the pool, I got Dub calmed down, the dogs fell asleep much quicker that we did and the entire neighborhood DOES NOT think we are totally out of our minds!

I have not become addicted to marshmallow fluff! It is not such an addiction that I got a recipe off the www and am going to try to make my own this evening! OOOOOH - - don't ever put it on a peanut butter sandwich! It's not good at all - really - just not good at all!

Yesterday at the grocery store, I did not hit the sample chick three times for these little pizza snack dealies she was giving out. And on my third visit, she did NOT give me a double serving and tell me I couldn't come back! That would just be wrong.

I did not spend almost my entire Sunday afternoon watching coverage of Indianapolis 500 qualifying to see if John Andretti could get his Richard Petty car into the field. (He did.) I was doing other things -- -- but never too far from the TV! NO - I'm not a die hard, dedicated race fanatic!

I wouldn't spend Sunday watching Indy - - especially since I did not spend Saturday afternoon watching earlier Indy qualifying and practice. And then Saturday evening watching NHRA drag racing. And then more of Saturday evening watching NASCAR All-Star races. No - I just don't like any kind of racing at all!

You got anything that you didn't do lately??

Tell us all about it!

Aint Kathurn, Rhett and Drug Store

2009-05-15T07:40:00.003-04:00

I always looked forward to those phone calls! "Sweetie! This is your Aint Kathurn calling all the way from Nashvul!" Yep, one of my Grandmother's sisters, Aunt Katherine calling me from Nashville, Tennessee.

My Grandmother had lots of brothers and sisters. We were never sure exactly how many - but there were at least a total of 10 or 12 of them. The list in the family bible shows three question marks that everyone thinks were babies who died very early.

But this is all about Aunt Katherine, her husband Curtis and their only child - a stray dog they adopted and named Drug Store!

If ever a person could 'be' a color it was Aunt Katherine. Imagine RED. Deep, dark, 1940's red with a little black mixed in to make it deeper. Flashy, sparkling, blinding, screaming R E D! In her 80's she was still bragging about her 'cute figure' and wonderful legs. And she was still wearing her short-shorts in her 80's, too! And since Uncle Curtis died 20 year before her, she had 'several' boyfriends to court her and keep her company. But she never would consider getting married again. She was worried that they were just after her money!

And Uncle Curtis - the only way to describe him is Rhett Butler. No, not a bit like Clark Gable. But he was a dead ringer for Rhett Butler! He not only had the look - but the swagger and that attitude, too! And, boy, did he know that he was good lookin'. I loved going out to dinner with them. Uncle Curtis would tease Aunt Katherine about how all the women were jealous of her getting to be with him! He was totally devoted to Aunt Katherine. They just fit together like a pair of spoons!

These two were very loving, giving people. They tried for years to have children with no success. They would borrow the children of relatives during summer vacations, but it just wasn't the same as having your own. Well, they found a starving stray dog behind the local pharmacy - took him home - and named him Drug Store! That dog had the best life you could imagine. He was bathed, brushed, loved and pampered. When it was meal time, whatever they were eating, Drug Store was eating. He could understand anything you said to him. If you told him to go get a blanket, he'd bring a blanket. Ask for a ball, you got a ball. You could name any of his toys and he'd bring the right one. Towel, brush, bear, shoes, slippers, pillow . . . he knew it all!

I look forward to seeing them again some day - Aint Kathurn, Rhett and Drug Store!

Our Weekend Guest

2009-05-05T22:26:00.007-04:00

Early last week L called us from Middleofnowhere, GA asking if we would baby sit for them while they drove to West Palm for a wedding.

Before fully understanding what we were in for, Dub said we would be glad to. THAT was when L explained that they would be dropping Peanut off Thursday evening.

Peanut is a pygmy goat and is just five weeks old. He was born prematurely and his mother would have nothing to do with him. L and her daughter have raised him on powdered goat milk mixed with fresh goat milk they get from a friend who raises milk goats.

This was one of the funniest weekends I have ever had in my life! Dixie, our female rat terrier took a sniff and knew she wanted nothing to do with this creature. But Rascal decided that this would be the perfect playmate! And he was so right. He and that goat fought to get out the door and into the front yard first; and the race was on!

First Rascal would chase Peanut, then Peanut would take a quick turn around one of my rose bushes and ram into Rascal's rear end! Rascal would then yelp like a little girl and run like crazy with that tiny goat hot on his trail .. .. .. .. .. until the goat would fall and roll over about six times, get up and shake it off - giving Rascal time to turn around and come after Peanut again!

This would go on for at least 20 minutes and that poor little Peanut would come jump into my lap and just fall over - exhausted! Five minutes later he'd start screaming for his bottle!

After his bottle, Peanut would run back into the house and head straight into the living room and vault himself onto the couch. He'd stand there softly crying until I would sit down with lots of baby blankets for him to curl up on in my lap and he would sleep for hours.

This little guy weighs almost 5 pounds now. He gets 1 cup of milk in his bottle every 4 or 5 hours. Do you know how much pee a tiny little goat can make out of 1 cup of milk? I didn't actually measure it - but I would estimate it to be right around 2 GALLONS at least!

That little bottle of milk is almost his complete intake. He does graze a little when he's outside. Just a couple of blades of grass, a tiny flower, a leaf off my crepe myrtle - guess how much poop comes out after that tiny little bit of food???? Oh - maybe half a shovel full! I just kept reminding myself that it was great fertilizer! Even when I kept stepping in it. (Yes, I live in Florida. Yes, I am bare footed most of the time.)

Everything went really well until Saturday afternoon. Dub took the dogs with him somewhere in the Jeep and Peanut and I had just come inside from a romp in the front yard. We were just getting comfortable on the couch when the phone rang.

So, I'm yacking away on the phone and petting Peanut as he sleeps so peacefully in my lap. I heard Dub drive back into the carport - and who could miss them coming into the house? Those two dogs sound like a herd of elephants on the rampage when they come in!

Well, I guess little Peanut didn't hear them. When Rascal jumped onto the couch, it scared Peanut so bad he - um - er - hm - lost control of various body functions! I got off the phone as Peanut went running through the living room (still leaking everywhere) trying to get into his crate!

I am covered in at least two liquids (or semi-liquids) - neither of which can be adequately be described here. There is absolutely no possible way that the fluids that saturated SIX flannel baby blankets AND my t-shirt AND my jeans shorts could have all come from that teeny, tiny, little, bitty, cute, soft, snuggly, itsy, bitsy, pygmy goat!

Dub sure seemed to think it was really funny! Somehow, the humor was lost on me.

L and family came and picked Peanut up Sunday. We have almost recovered from our baby sitting. I think that the next time they ask us to baby sit we will have to remember to ask them precisely which critter it is we are baby sitting - before we commit to anything!

The Pickle

2009-04-28T20:52:00.007-04:00

HAPPY 12TH BIRTHDAY, PICKLE!!

I'm so proud to be able to say that you are my Grandson! You are such a great kid. You make terrific grades in school, you're nice to your little sister (sometimes), you have great manners (when you want to), your a fast runner, you like to help people AND - you're my GRANDSON!!

I hope your Tuesday was the best - and the whole year will be full of wonderful things for you!

Love,

Grammaw

How To Install A Home Security System

2009-04-23T21:48:00.002-04:00

*HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM*
1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

Bubba,
Big'un, Duke, Slim and I went for more ammo and beer. Back in an hour.

Don't mess with the pit bulls - they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up bad.

I don't think Killer took part, but it was kinda hard to tell from all the blood.

Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside just in case.

Cooter

Rabbit Ears

2009-04-20T22:52:00.001-04:00

So, they told us that February was the deadline. Get a converter box by then or you may never see television again!

Now they keep scrolling constantly across our televisions that the switch over will be in June.

All of us older folks said years ago - when cable first came about - that some day they would find a way to make us all pay for television programming. Of course, we didn't expect to see it until at least the year 2005! Oh - wait - it's 2009 already! It's coming - everyone will have pay TV!

And radio!! First we thought nothing would ever touch our old friend AM radio. It's just too 'with it', too 'cool' for anyone to mess with. Let 'em screw around with FM, all they have is classical music and those talk shows. Nobody cares about FM. No sooner do we get soooooo comfortable with our friend AM - and zap - all the good stuff moves to FM! Okay, I can live with that. I know how to make my radio tune in an FM station. This works for me just fine! We old folks love stereo - we actually know how to tune stereo. We just don't do it when you young ones are looking!

Oh, no - they can't leave that alone, either. Now we're all going to have to buy XM or Serius radios - and subscribe to their monthly services as well! I'd be willing to bet the the old time AM and FM radio will be gone before you know it! Nothing left to do but plug into your MP3 - or buy into their new programs!

What do you think?

Or am I too late again???

For Our Wonderful Youth of Today!

2009-04-17T15:08:00.005-04:00

Dear Youth of Today,

You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know something, We had to go to the darned library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalogue!!

There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter, with a pen! Then you had to walk all the way down the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there! Stamps were 10 cents!

Child Protective Services didn't care if our parents beat us. As a matter of fact, the parents of all my friends also had permission to kick our butts, too! No where was safe!

There were no MP3' s or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the dang record store and shoplift it yourself! Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd usually talk over the beginning and screwed it all up! There were no CD players! We had tape decks in our car. We'd play our favorite tape and "eject" it when finished and the tape would come undone. Cause that's how we rolled, dig?

We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it! And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your Bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!

We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like 'Space Invaders' and asteroids'. Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!

You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your lazy butt and walk over to the TV to change the channel! There was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rats! And there were maybe SIX channels to choose from if you were really lucky!

And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove ... Imagine that!

That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980 or before!

Regards,
The over 30 Crowd

WHEW!!

2009-04-14T13:32:00.002-04:00

We have just narrowly missed a crisis! A storm just came through our neighborhood - and I'm sure that the weather experts will do their studies to decide - but I saw it myself - - we have had a tornado!

There are at least 5 homes within three blocks of us that are really seriously damaged - - no roof, no carport, no screened porches or pool enclosures, walls down. There's siding and insulation in the trees and all over the ground. I can't count the homes with miscellaneous minor damage.

NO INJURIES!!

Our only damage is in the yard and to the pool enclosure. I can sure live with that after seeing the rest of the area!

I went to help a near neighbor - Sweet, young, single mother of three. She was at work - kids were all at school. We could see from our house that her roof was gone. Dub and I walked over - her next door neighbor called her at work and told her how bad it was.

This mom works for Western Waste - yep, she drives a garbage truck! And makes a darned good living doing it. It took her about 30 minutes to get home - - and her mother got there about the same time. We all just kept repeating, "It's only a house."

Here's the greatest part! About 15 minutes later, her boss shows up. He walked around outside the house . . . . walked through inside. He then started making phone calls. Once he got off the phone he helped move everything out of the children's bedrooms; they were the worst off.

Less than an hour later, here comes a crew of guys from Western Waste with plywood, tarps, tools, ladders, etc. As I am typing this, they're over there doing what they can to get coverage over her home before the next wave of rain comes through!

Oh - a few of them even went next door to help the widow over there with a tiny bit of damage she had!

Kinda renews your faith in mankind, doesn't it!

Middleofnowhere, Georgia

2009-04-13T16:57:00.005-04:00

We got a phone call this morning from Middleofnowhere, Georgia. It was Dub's daughter L giving us an update on what's happening on their little farm/ranch/home.

As some of you already know, L, husband M, son W (13) and daughter G (5) live on a bunch of acres in a lovely home and have animals - LOTS of animals. One dog, at least 8 cats, maybe 15 pigs, 30 goats, about a zillion chickens, turkeys, ducks, geese, 2 rabbits (soon to be many, many more), 2 pet rats, a miniature bull and I don't know what else they may have picked up lately.

Last week one of the goats had a baby prematurely and just walked away from it. This isn't gonna happen - not with L and G around. The mom and daughter team got rags and cleaned up the little kid (with help from Buddy, the dog), fixed a bottle and started feeding it.

This little thing is about the size of a small puppy - no hair at all - can't even stand up yet - and here they are hugging, petting, loving and feeding it like a baby.

Yesterday while L and G were outside feeding all the critters, they laid the baby goat out in the sun to get some fresh air and maybe nibble on a little grass. Buddy, the guard dog - who thinks everything within the property belongs to him - LOVES that little goat. Ya have to watch him constantly because one day he's going to lick it to death!

All is calm on the farm, the feeding is going just like always - and then Buddy fires up with the barking and growling. Holy cow - he's having a fit. G, having her typical 'I am 5 year old girl' fit goes running - - as she's closest to Buddy. This child knows no fear!

Now we have G and Buddy both running - barking, yelling, waving, jumping - WHEW - that was a close call. Was it a snake? A hawk? A coyote? Oh, no - - one of those deadly, attack turkeys got too close to the baby goat and Buddy's feminine side kicked in.

As G went back to feeding the pigs, Buddy curled up around the tiny goat and they both took a nap.

Happy Easter

2009-04-12T00:34:00.000-04:00

Why is it that the Easter Bunny thinks that old ladies and their husbands don't want Easter baskets?

I'm just sayin' . . . . does he think Peeps are just for kids? Chocolate covered marshmallow eggs are not for anyone over 21? Fluffy bunnies only go to cute little girls with dimples?

I'm fixin' to get ready to protest! I want my chocolate bunny! And I want it NOW! And where are my Cadbury Creme Eggs? Like a DOZEN of them???

the Easter Bunny hates me!

Oh, wait! I could go to Walgreen's Monday and it will ALL BE ON SALE!!!! At least 50% off!!

Never mind!

$3,200 LCD 61" Super Gizmo Rob Ya Blind Television of Tomorrow!

2009-04-09T21:09:00.003-04:00

Please tell me that this is NOT something that you would do to your poor, innocent little dog! I would never do such things to Dixie or Rascal. I draw the line at Santa hats and reindeer antlers! Okay, maybe I did, one time, put pajamas on Dixie when she was really, really small; but, only ONCE or maybe six times!

Look at this storage idea! Turn your staircase into stacked drawers! I think maybe you would have to do this when you were building the stairs.

I can't imagine trying to do this as a re-fit. . . . hubby would have to be pretty talented in the handyman department to make this work, if ya ask me.

Dub and I went to buy a new TV today. Geez! I was totally unaware that I needed a complete electronics education before walking into any store to even browse! I had looked around the interweb a little - very little.

I thought it couldn't be that danged hard. Our old one is 32" - we wanted one a little bigger . . . and flatter would be nice. That's it. Our first salesman looked at us with pity and greed in his eye as he started showing us the $3,200 LCD 61" Super Gizmo Rob Ya Blind Television of Tomorrow! No, thanks - we're just looking.

I found a salesman I liked much better, told him I wanted something UNDER $1,000, at least 32" - what do ya have! He showed us a pretty good selection; then left us alone to look them over and make up our minds. (Dub isn't going to a bunch of stores shopping around - a tv is a tv - pick one.)

We pick out the tv - I leave Dub and Mr. Salesman to settle the money and I go wandering. When I come back and we start out the door, innocent little me says, "So, what time will they deliver it tomorrow?"

"Some time on the 23rd." Replied Dub.

I'm not so sure I want to repeat exactly what I said in response to that - something like, "What, dear?" Only not quite so calm. Or not so polite. Or not so sweet!

I guess the one we picked out is so popular that it won't be in until then.

Until April 23rd, we will be saddled with dealing with the old tv. The one we are replacing. The one that turns itself off at random times throughout the day and evening. The one that can then only be turned back on by pulling the plug and plugging it back in. EVERY FRIGGING TIME!! Sometimes it does this every five minutes! Sometimes it only does it once an hour.

Toshiba does not care. They will not respond to my emails. My NEW tv is NOT a Toshiba.

Miscellaneous Whatevers

2009-04-07T21:17:00.005-04:00

What with today being my birthday - AND National No Housework Day, I've pretty much been just hanging out. Yesterday it was warm here. Today, we're freezing - well, it was 61 - but for US that's freezing. I read a lot of blogs. I baked my birthday cake. I watched tv. I talked to 4 wonderful grand children. I talked to a son, two almost daughters and an almost son. My husband cooked one of my favorite dinners. All is right with the world!

It's almost Easter. I want the Easter Bunny to bring me a baby bunny, a tiny, little bitty puppy that will stay tiny and little bitty and a 20 pound chocolate rabbit!

I found a blog today about idiots in parking lots. Laughed my butt off! The only reason I laughed sooooo hard is because it was too darned true!

Remember the Segway? That electric scooter for adults with the gyro deal in it so you don't have to worry about balancing? The one that you can't use at any Disney parks! The one I've never seen being used anywhere in public? But maybe you have if you live somewhere larger than say 5,000 people! Anywhooo - They are now building a 2-seater version! A 35mph 2-seater version! Wonder how much that baby will set ya back!

Speaking of electric vehicles - - - I saw a high performance motorcycle on tv today. Electric! Has a 150 mile range on each charge - goes 60mph - and actually looks like a motorcycle! It's called a Zero something-or-other.

Our 'investment counselor' called today. She was playing her role as Susie Sunshine today. Our account is up 2% so far for April! Um - yeah, it's only the 7th - and we're only DOWN 48% from where we were 28 months ago! I guess she thinks we're livin' the high life on that 2%!

Tomorrow is gonna be really exciting! We're going to cruise around Melbourne (Florida) until we find the Snap-On Tool guy and get a warranty replacement on some tools. Then we're going to Incredible Pets! An independent pet shop that deals mostly in exotics. I got my first sugar glider from them. They specialize in reptiles (turtles and lizards and snakes, oh my) and birds - - but also have a lot of fish and usually a few fuzzies, too! I like to go and just look. A lot of the critters have big signs on the cages warning that you must have special licenses from the state before you can purchase them. I like the Marmoset Monkeys the best. They have a pair - not for sale - they are both really calm. They're in a huge enclosure and hang together like an old married couple. They hold hands, groom each other, play tag - sometimes they come up to the glass and look at you - and you just want to reach in and introduce yourself and start a conversation. They look so much more intelligent than so many of the people you run into on the street these days!

National No Housework Day

2009-04-06T12:35:00.003-04:00

**April 7 is National No Housework Day!!

**It is also my birthday!!

**Anyone who knows me understands that this is not a mere coincidence! I have never been good at any type of housework. I cannot think of any type of housework that I have ever enjoyed. Housework to me is not just drudgery - it is pure torture!

**I have tried to enjoy it. I turn on my favorite music, put on loose, comfortable clothing and tell myself that this will really be FUN, FUN, FUN! My brain ain't buyin' it!

**So - tomorrow - on my birthday/National No Housework Day - I will be doing absolutely NO housework. It's against the law. Like removing those 'Do Not Remove' tags from pillows or something!

**You probably shouldn't take any chances either - I would hate to have to contribute to the fund to raise bail to get you out of jail just because you decided to take a chance and do some housework on April 7!

**Enjoy your bon bons and soap operas!

Cute Little Piggie

2009-04-05T17:43:00.003-04:00

What a cute little piggie!

This is the kind of picture that I love to look at.

This is the kind of picture that makes me want to never eat bacon again.

or ham!

or chitterlings!

just kidding about the chitterlings - I've never eaten a chitlin' and I ain't about to start!

Join me at the beach!

2009-04-04T23:43:00.004-04:00

I have a friend who sends me pictures from time to time - - and I just love his work.

Every time I see I have mail from him I just can't wait to open it and see the latest creations he has.

Enjoy your trip to the beach today!

Gas Powered Yard Machines Hate Me!

2009-04-03T19:38:00.000-04:00

Dub and I decided to get a little outside stuff done today. We rotated the tires on the mower. And while it was jacked up, decided we should remove the blade and sharpen it. I mean, how hard can THAT be?

First of all, our floor jack will not lift the front of the mower high enough to get an impact wrench under the nut we must remove to take the blade off. So Dub decides to do it the easy way (sure!). We jack it up as high as we can. We install jack stands under each side to hold it up. Lower the floor jack, place a brick on the floor jack and then jack the mower a little higher . . . .oh, about a brick-width higher!

Yep, that's good. Dub's ready to stick his whole body in there.. .. .. .. NOPE!! Not while Mrs. Safety (me) is still breathing. There is no way this looks safe enough for me to let a fly go under that mower. I retreat to the storage room and come out with the ramps we use when changing the oil in the Jeep. Okay - I place them under the front wheels of the mower, and tell him to take off the blade.

Never, ever would I say it - - - NEVER - - - but, the instant he hit that impact wrench, the floor jack (with the brick on it) slipped and let the front wheels drop. But only about 1/16" onto the ramps I had installed! Okay, "I told you so", I really did want to say it loudly - but I didn't! I whispered it really soft.

After getting the mower back together with no further adventures - I decided I would do a little weed eating. Of course, the Weedeater and a different idea. Dub pulls the cord once - it starts and runs like crazy.

Dub wanders down the street to discuss the latest mailbox murder with a neighbor as I did damage to some weeds. After a little while, I took a break. Now that darn thing won't start. Won't vroom at all. No amount of yanking on the cord, no amount of choking, not choking, begging, whining, etc. is making a difference. This is our NEW "Start on First Pull" super, duper weed eater! I went into the shed, dug out my 20 year old electric weed eater and super long extension cords, plugged that baby in and ate weeds to my hearts content.

Is it possible that gasoline powered lawn equipment hates me for some unknown reason?

Uncle Shelby

2009-03-31T19:58:00.000-04:00

Today Pioneer Woman made mention of Shel Silverstein - which brought back very fond memories for me. I do love some Shel Silverstein.

My favorite work of his - by far - is UNCLE SHELBY'S ABZ's. This is the greatest coloring book ever. Do not, ever - under any circumstances - allow children near this book. I know that if you go to your local book store, you're probably going to find it in the section with all the kid type books - but I'm here to tell ya .. .. .. no good can come from children getting knowledge from this book!

I'm not sure where my 2 or 3 copies are right this minute - but here are some bits and pieces that I remember:

"B is for baby. See the baby. The baby is pink. The baby is cute. The baby is fat. See the baby play. Play baby play. Mommy loves the baby . . . . . more than she loves you."

"E is for egg. E is also for Ernie. Ernie is the genie that lives in the ceiling. Ernie LOVES eggs. Throw an egg at the ceiling and yell 'Catch, Ernie, catch the egg!' and Ernie will reach down and catch the egg." Hey, JB - you remember that one?

"P is for Pony. See the pony. The pony lives in the gas tank of Daddy's car. He makes the car go. That is called "horse power". Maybe the pony is hungry--Pour some nice sugar into the gas tank. Ponies love sugar. When Daddy comes home tell him you have fed the pony and maybe he will buy you a cowboy suit."

The artwork is just as distorted as his mind .. .. there are other goodies such as a smudged spot where it says there should be a nice, shiny quarter (unless someone stole it). There a coupon you can cut out and take to the store and get a FREE REAL LIVE PONY!!!

He also suggests that you take all the nasty dirty money that mommy and daddy fight about and put it in an envelope and mail it to Uncle Shel Silverstein, P.O. Box 123. . . . .. . . . .

For the hippo at the zoo it's something about helping to remove the bone in his throat that it is choking on - and the hippo will turn into a prince and give you a million dollars!

I'm telling you, if you've never seen it - go to the book store and just sit there and read it - it's not that long. Or - if you're feeling rich, buy it (and a new box of Crayons, too) and leave it on the coffee table. Color it - coloring is good for the soul. It is certainly a great conversation starter!

Not Me! Monday! is on Hold - This is Just Another Monday!

2009-03-30T09:42:00.000-04:00

**How long do we have to be retired before people figure out that to us that means stop calling us at 7:15am just to chat? We're always awake at 7:15pm, why not call us then?

**Every time we and/or the dogs go in our front yard, the large pit bull across the street runs up and down his fence line barking. He doesn't stop until we are completely out of sight. He is a beautiful dog but he is HUGE and I think my head would fit in his mouth. And he barks really loudly! "Tech" got out of his yard last week and it took his owner 30 minutes to catch him. I look out the window now to see where he is before I go in the front yard!

**Here in Florida we are required to have one license plate on the back of our vehicles. Why do some people go get that single license plate and then say, "I have to put them on my car." It's the same with a driver's license - it is a single item, but is referred to as them on a regular basis. I'm not the grammar police, but this just drives me crazy.

**DANGER, BE ON THE ALERT, DANGER** The latest news reports are again calling for a new huge computer virus to hit APRIL 1, 2009! Why is it that these computer meanies pick on April Fools Day to hit us with a virus every year? I'm gonna do a complete fresh back-up tonight just in case.

**It's a sunny day here - I think I will go do some laundry and actually hang outside to flap in the breeze! I just love fresh sheets that have dried in the sun!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JB!!

2009-03-27T15:56:00.000-04:00

UPDATE: News Bulletin!! Why didn't someone tell me that it is now 2009? How bad a mother am I that I can't remember how old my only child is!!! I'm going to blame it on my own old age (62 in just over a week), the pain pills - and the fact that I still can't remember when my own mother's birthday is! Baby, you know I love you no matter how old and feeble I get!

Happy Birthday to my wonderful, sweet, caring baby boy! Yep, that's my little JB.

On this, your 36th birthday I would like to take this opportunity to tell you and the world just how proud I am to call you my son.

You were a terrific kid - and pretty easy to raise - most of the time. And somehow even with me for your mother, you have just turned out great!

You participate in your community and try to help make the world a better place. You are a true and loyal friend. You found the perfect wife and between the two of you have created two no longer so little kids who are also turning out just a well as Mom and Dad did!

If I have done nothing else in my entire life, I would be happy that my one accomplishment was you!

Now that your children are getting older, I think you and Karen are starting to feel some of the things that her parents and I feel about you two.

Just wait - The best is yet to come for y'all!

Love,

Momma

I Need A Smile!

2009-03-25T16:32:00.000-04:00

Just because I need a smile, I am subjecting you to this strange collection of pictures!

First is our adorable Panda! If they would stay this size I would go buy one today. Right this minute. And plant my entire yard in bamboo just to keep it happy. And I would name him Edgar.

Next is probably going to have DCF knocking at my front door in about 15 minutes. This is a cute little number I found on the world wide web! I think the official title is "red neck time out"! Which is not too hard to believe. Honest, DCF, I have no children in this house and did not take this picture.

The beautiful horses shown in the next photo is a tribute to several women I know - who refuse to swim in the ocean, lakes, rivers, etc. because "fish pee in there"! I must add that this shot and the panda are from ihasahotdog.com and the various branches it has. They have some of the greatest dog and cat (and some other animal) pictures with quotes. I have laughed out loud at something on there almost every time I visit!

Our final shot today is a nice relaxing day at the beach. I'm sure we've all had some days when we felt that things were a little crowded - and wished we had just a little more room. But I doubt that I will ever complain again having new seen what they have to deal with when they go to a beach in China! And I can see that the smog has not improved since the Olympics either!

The Saga Continues - Cake Bites 2 / Poor, Sweet Little Old Lady ZERO

2009-03-24T20:03:00.000-04:00

I really tried to let bygones be bygones. Just totally let go of yesterday. Forgive those bullying Cake Bites and give them another chance.

After all, it's a new day. The sun is shining. And I just happen to know where they sell Chocolate. Yeah, it wasn't really the Cake Bites that were the enemy. It was that mean old Baker's Semi-Sweet Chocolate. That's who had it out for me yesterday!

I'm sorry Cake Bites. Let's just pretend that our little chocolate miss-adventure never happened yesterday!

I went to the store and got Hershey's Semi-Sweet Chocolate Morsels. How could anyone go wrong with Hershey's. Hershey's loves everyone. Hershey's will do anything you ask! Hooray, all my cake bite worries are over. or not!

My neighbor, Patti (who could make bricks with peat moss taste good) tells me that you shouldn't keep chocolate warming too long. It can get a little clumpy. Oh, great - NOW she tells me . . . . after the first 1/2 zillion cake bites turn out almost pretty good and the second 1/2 zillion look much, much more than a little clumpy.

And don't you DARE even ask me about why I didn't fancy them up with a beautiful little drizzle of chocolate as a finishing touch!

By the time I was finished I was ready to do my finishing touch with the heavy end of a meat mallet!

Bakerella and The Pioneer Woman Really Don't Need To Worry About Me Taking Their Place!!

2009-03-23T20:03:00.000-04:00

For those of you who have been keeping up with Bakerella and The Pioneer Woman in the quest for the perfect Cake Pop - Cake Bites - and other yummy and beautiful Cake Creations, you may want to stop reading. This may damage your chances of perfecting your caking skills.

For those of you who have NOT been watching Bakerella and The Pioneer Woman, shame on you. They remind me a little of Lucy and Ethel . . . the funny part, not the stupid part! If you need addresses here they are: thepioneerwoman.com then click on 'cooking' at the top and browse around. You'll find the cake pops eventually. And bakerella.blogspot.com the inventor of the Cake Pop and Cake Bites.

Okay - so here's what has happened in my kitchen today. Somehow or other, it entered my mind to make a carrot cake today. As anyone who knows me will gladly tell you, I am way beyond challenged in the kitchen. Me baking a cake is highly unusual. Therefore, family and friends will not be surprised at the outcome.

I prepared the mix precisely as directed on the package. Poured it into my rarely used Wilton Bundt Pan, set the timer and got her to cooking. When the timer went off, I inserted a bamboo skewer to make sure it was done. Yep, clean! The cake is done!!

I set it on a cake rack to cool and set the timer for 10 minutes. During those 10 minutes, I was Little Susie Homemaker! I washed all my little cake making utensils, put away the mixer, etc. Man, maybe at almost 62 years old, I was finally getting the hang of this kitchen thing!

The timer goes off!! Yippee! I got a clean cooling rack, laid it on top of the bundt pan and flipped the whole thing over.

I immediately felt weight shift onto the cooling rack and felt my chest fill with pride. I carefully started to lift the bundt pan. Uh-oh! It's feeling a little heavier than it should. I set it back down, got a flashlight and peeked under the edge. Yep, the cake was on the cooling rack - NOT stuck in the pan.

I went ahead and lifted the bundt pan off. Great! About the top 1/3 of the cake is still in the top of the dang pan. Okay, I'll just carefully nudge it out and use the icing to 'glue' it on. Sure, like that cake is really gonna cooperate with me. Like that's ever gonna happen in my kitchen.

The instant that I touch the cake remaining in the pan, ALL the cake remaining in the pan reduces itself to crumbs. So much for glue.

Here's where things really get fun! I got out the canned icing. I put a big glob of icing in a huge bowl, I put the cake crumbs in the bowl and I put the big chunk of cake in the bowl because I have decided that I am Bakerella and Pioneer Woman all rolled into one. However; I forgot my Chef's hat and my cowgirl boots and my apron, too! At this point all that could have saved me would have been my Wonder Woman cape - and that's in the laundry!!

The cake balls didn't turn out too bad. I don't think. Maybe. Now for melting the Baker's Semi-Sweet Chocolate! or not. I had plenty of chocolate. I put it all in a nice deep Tupperware bowl and set it in the microwave. Two minutes later I checked it. It was still perfectly formed chocolate squares! So, I'm thinking (big mistake) that the chocolate should be starting to melt by now - and I put it back in for another two minutes!

The timer goes off, I open the microwave door and black smoke rolls out!!! And the odor!! Yep, ALL the chocolate is now burned - thoroughly, completely burned. In reading directions more carefully I have since found that the chocolate will retain the square shape and that you must stir, stir, stir! And heat the chocolate 30 seconds at a time, at least I think that's what it said.

I now have about a zillion cake balls on waxed paper sitting on my kitchen counter that Dixie is trying to find a way to get to. I have a headache. Dub is asking me where the carrot cake is. Where is my rum?
* * * * * * *

Not Me! Monday!

2009-03-23T00:15:00.000-04:00

UPDATE!! They are in CRISIS mode over at mycharmingkids.net - - Stellan was taken to the hospital last night with breathing problems, which pretty quickly turned into heart problems! MckMama is at Childrens Hospital with Stellan and PC is home with the other MSC. There have been a lot of attempts to get his heart under control with no success so far .. .. .. get the prayers going!

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I did not buy one of those really, really big GIANT Hershey bars and eat the entire thing, all by myself in only 48 hours. That would be just awful. That would break every possible health and diet rule known to mankind. I couldn't possibly have done that!

The Attack Rat Terriers did NOT just come flying out of the bedroom at about 100mph, barking like mad, fur on their backs standing straight up! Both of them pawing at the back door to get out. I DID NOT have flashbacks to earlier this year of Dub in his boxers and a cat in the pool! Against my better judgement I let them out! Thankfully, it was a false alarm! There really wasn't a madman out in the yard waiting to kill us all!

We have been on water restrictions here because of the drought conditions. It's spring. Every vehicle within 500 miles is yellow from the pine pollen. SO .. .. .. when it started sprinkling this afternoon, it was not Dub and I who rushed outside and pulled the Jeep out of the carport so it could get a bath! It was someone else that our neighbors saw doing that. We wouldn't be that silly, would we??

I have not become thoroughly enthralled with little Jonah Williams and all his ups and downs since his birth. His blog is patriceandmattwilliams.blogspot.com . Or - you can check my sidebar and just click on his box. He sure seems to be one determined little fighter! He has EB and the doctors are still trying to figure out just what degree of the condition he has and how to best treat him. If you have a spare minute, prayers are always welcome!

Got any fun things you haven't done lately?????

* * * * *

Circle the Wagons! The Idiots Are Coming!

2009-03-21T20:34:00.000-04:00

Yep, that's right. The Idiots are coming. Of course in a lot of cases they are already here and have been for a long time. But now I think we're getting a whole new breed!

I made a quick stop at our local convenience store the other afternoon. There stands Joe Tourist discussing the shuttle launch that is happening that very evening. Mr. Tourist is very upset because those jerks on guard at Kennedy Space Center wouldn't let him on the property to watch the launch. He's got his huge land yacht in the parking lot with mom, kids, dogs, cousins, etc. and the guards won't let him in! He's a tax payer! He should be allowed to go as close as he wants! At this point, I look at the clerk, the clerk looks at me .. .. .. and we were both obviously thinking exactly the same thought. "Yes, park right next to the launch pad. Within 3 seconds of lift-off all traces of you, the land yacht and your family will just be a sad memory!" It took all the strength I could muster not to just burst out in uncontrollable laughter. Idiot!

We have a new neighbor. They have a beautiful dog. He is black and white. He is a really big pit bull. And he barks. A lot. He never stops. Well, almost never. He does stop to eat and drink. Then he barks some more. Animal Control has come to visit a couple of times. They have written 2 tickets to the owners. The owners pay the tickets. The dog still barks. Idiots!

The family that lives next door to the barking pit bull has a beautiful collie. The collie used to bark. A lot. They finally broke him of that awful barking habit about 6 months ago. Guess who is learning how to bark again! Idiot!

Time for Presidential sensitivity training. President Obama went on Jay Leno's show and made a comment about how his bowling skills compare to those of someone in the Special Olympics. Idiot! This is NOT a political statement on my part - it is an idiot statement!

The CPA who handles taxes for my former employer (the job I retired from over a month ago) called me a couple of weeks ago (on my cell). He wanted to know if I was going to pick up the corporate tax return and check it over before I delivered it to 'the boss'. I explained (for the third time) that I am retired, I don't work there any more and that he should call 'the boss' and see if they want to pick it up or what! Idiot!

Two Little Whiners

2009-03-20T22:15:00.000-04:00

Dub left the house this afternoon to go get a haircut. Well, actually, he went to get them ALL cut. But that's beside the point. I was left here at home, alone with two little whiners!

Both the 5 year old and the 7 year old moped around the house - all because Dub wouldn't let them go with him. I can't say that I blame him. It's rare that he gets to go anywhere or do anything on his own. We're usually the whole gang when we go out. So - today I stayed home with the youngsters and let him have a little peace and quiet.

I tried taking them outside to play ball. We played tag. I turned on the sprinkler (we're in Florida - it was 80 degrees today)! I really tried to be entertaining. For some reason, I'm just not connecting with them today. I'll go turn on cartoons! Back into the house we go.

Snack time! Everybody got a yummy snack and then we all snuggled up to take a rest. I just managed to open my book to do a little reading - - when the kiddos hear something .. .. .. .. what is it? Could it be? Are you sure?

They run joyfully to the door as Dub pulls into the driveway. As I open the door - - - there they go * * * *

Running as fast as they can!

Screaming for joy!

Jumping all over Dub!

TAILS WAGGING 1,000 MPH!

BOY, THOSE DOGS LOVE HIM!

At least my little Sugar Glider loves me - I think!

* * * * * * * *

Great Diet & Exercise Tips!!

2009-03-18T18:21:00.000-04:00

I received this from a friend - and have decided that I want to do whatever is necessary to find this doctor and sign up for this program immediately!

Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it.... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! .... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best! Feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! ‘Round’ is a shape!

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember: 'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride'

Looking for a New House?

2009-03-17T21:27:00.000-04:00

This is the Coral Castle near Homestead, FL. I've been to this one and it certainly qualifies as strange. This little guy is supposed to have built it by himself out of HUGE blocks of coral without the aid of any modern machines, cranes, etc. His precision and balance are simply amazing.

I'm not too sure what the main idea with this one is. Probably wide open spaces. I would imagine that the owners are not the least bit afraid of heights. It would also be interesting to see just how you get into it and out! Maybe you could just parachute down . . . but that looks like a pretty rough climb to make carrying groceries!

I really like that this one at least has a visible front door - with a chimney for an awning! The angle of the windows would be pretty interesting from inside, but would probably be a decorators nightmare! How do you design window treatments for that?

Okay, Dub and I are really, really fishing addicts! If there is water, we are likely to try to pull a fish out of it. Fly fishing, spin casting, surf fishing, deep sea fishing - sheesh, I've been seen with a rod and reel in my front yard (okay, I was just practicing my casting) - but even I will draw the line at living inside a fish!

I have seen this house (or one exactly like it) near Knoxville, TN. It really does look remarkably like a recently landed flying saucer. The entrance is a set of stairs that drops down from the belly. I didn't get to go in - but it looks almost livable from outside. I imagine that hurricanes, bad wind storms, etc. would be no problem for this baby!

Not Me! Monday!

2009-03-16T00:15:00.000-04:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Sunday evening someone in this house did not make a valiant attempt at making caramel corn. That same someone did not slightly over cook the first popper full of popcorn. Okay, she did not completely BURN the first popper full of popcorn! No way that could happen in this house!

It couldn't possibly be me who has been clipping coupons like a crazy person for weeks - and keeps forgetting to take them with me to the grocery store. There is no way I could possibly do something that stoopid three weeks in a row!

I DO NOT have a black thumb. Plants love me. That's why I could not possibly have a very badly sunburned plant in my front yard right now! Yes, this afternoon it will be moved back where it came from. Karen and JB sent me this big, beautiful tropical plant last year. It has been sitting in its pot by the screened in pool all this time - thriving! Doing so well that the roots were coming out the top of the pot. Tropical plants grow everywhere here in Florida - or should I say Flori-DUH! Instead of just getting a bigger pot I decided to just plant it. Well, the darned thing does not like sun! My neighbor (who talks to plants I think) says this particular plant is sunburned - and will die a slow and painful death unless it is returned to the shade immediately. I do not want to be responsible for the death of that plant and will be moving it, as stated, this afternoon! Please do not report me to the plant police!

Your turn .. .. .. what didn't you do?

* * * * * * * * * *

Changing a Light Bulb

2009-03-12T12:44:00.000-04:00

Question: How many women with MENOPAUSE does it take to change a light bulb?

Woman's Answer: One! ONLY ONE!!!!
And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And,once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the #&%!* light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER PICKS UP OR CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE! AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL !!

I'm sorry.
What was the question?

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Bunny, the MG and me

2009-03-10T20:45:00.000-04:00

About a million years ago, at MP High School I had a friend named C, but everybody called her Bunny. Her dad spoiled her rotten - as did all of our dads. We were part of a bunch of kids who all hung out together and pretty much never got into trouble for much of anything. Some of us made pretty good grades - most of us were average. We were all on speaking terms with the "in crowd" but not in the "in crowd".

Anyhoo - when Bunny turned 16, her loving daddy gave her a car. Not just any car. An MG. And not just any MG. A PINK MG - which spent almost it's entire life with her without its top! Her long, blond hair flying everywhere and more than likely I would be in the passenger seat applying the imaginary brake pedal on a regular basis!

We would dig around in the floorboard, the glove box, the bottom of our purses and anywhere else we could and come up with enough coins to fill that PINK MG up and go cruising any time we could get away.

When I think back to those days, I am so thankful that I grew up during that era. Our parents weren't afraid to let us just go wandering around town for hours on end. They knew our friends and our friends parents - and they knew us.

We knew what the limits were. I don't remember Bunny and I ever discussing what the boundaries were. We just knew where we should and shouldn't go - who we should and shouldn't be with. I don't think we ever were given a curfew.

Oh My Gosh!! I was one of those! NO - not that - not a "good girl"! Hey, Bunny, leave me a comment - I lost ya when you moved to The Island! TeeHee - you're a "good girl", too!

Not Me! Monday!

2009-03-09T00:17:00.000-04:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

**I absolutely did not sit up until 3:00 this morning just so I could finish a book I was reading! I just couldn't have been that absorbed in it and not even realised that it was that dang late (or early)!

**Wednesday I heard the mail delivery truck coming and decided to walk out and get the mail. Rascal, our shy (I thought) rat terrier came with me. He did NOT jump right up into her little mail truck wagging his entire rear half . . . drool dripping from his jaws! No, he's much better trained than that. And our mail 'chick' did not reach into her box of Milk Bones and reward him for it! Dixie and Rascal were both taught very early not to take food from strangers! How do we fix it now?

**A couple of weeks ago Dub had to have a pretty big chunk of his left ear cut out (cancer) and they used about a zillion stitches - and even had to do a skin graft. Tuesday we had to go have it checked to make sure everything was healing properly. We didn't drive all the way to the doctor's office (45 minute drive) to be told that we were supposed to be at his smaller office which is only about a 20 minute drive from us! Oh, no - we wouldn't do something that dumb!

So, please leave me your comment - what didn't you do?!

Upsidedowndogs

2009-03-07T00:22:00.000-05:00

I found a new site Friday evening! At least to me it's a new site.

upsidedowndogs.com

What a riot! Your dog lays on his/her back - you snap a picture - post it on the web site upside down. Some of the pictures are too, too funny - you can't even recognize what breed they are.

Some are so scary it would frighten their own mothers!!

Grocery Cart Rage!

2009-03-06T12:56:00.000-05:00

I got in trouble at the grocery store last week! I thought I was being nice. No, I'm sure I was being nice. BUT - the wicked witch behind me saw it differently! Here's the story!

I got in line to check out with my cart pretty well full. The wicked witch immediately lined up behind me - already complaining loudly about the long lines and the slow service. We hadn't even been in line two minutes and she's complaining?!

Up walks pleasant little old lady asking if she can please squeeze in to reach her National Enquirer. Of course I inched back a little - and asked wicked witch if she could move her cart back a little, too. She stated, "I'm not backing up for nuthin'!"

As I edged my cart sideways, giving little old lady full access to all the periodicals, I asked her if the bread, milk and paper was all she was getting. "Yes," she replied.

I just couldn't help myself. Before I knew what was happening, out of my mouth came, "Go ahead of me!" It was part just to spite wicked witch and part being kind to little old lady.

As little old lady thanked me and took her place in line, I felt a cart impact my ample rear none too gently. I turned, smiled, pulled my phone from my pocket and said, "One more time will get you a trip to jail for assault - I can feel the lasting effects of whiplash now."

As I was walking to my car and loading up my groceries I wondered what wicked witch would have thought if she knew I have a concealed weapon permit - and had a loaded .22 pistol in my purse when she rammed me with her cart! Good thing I don't have grocery cart rage!

Those of you who are anti-gun .. .. don't worry! During that entire situation having a gun in my purse never once crossed my mind. Yes, calling the police did, calling store security did - but I honestly did not think of that gun. I'll write more about my gun this weekend.

Not Me! Monday!

2009-03-02T00:15:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

~~One of our wandering neighborhood cats did not somehow get into our screened-in pool area in the middle of the night Wednesday. And said cat did not alert our two killer attack rat terriers who very vocally told us they needed to go outside. We didn't open the back door as usual - start to head for the screen door when all H*LL broke loose. NO - not two dogs, one cat and Dub (in his Bart boxers wielding a broom) all NOT running around the pool - and me NOT propping all the outside doors open hoping the cat would run outside! The cat did not end up leaping into the pool twice - as I was NOT trying to get the dogs into the house! At one point this cat was not actually hanging upside-down from the ceiling of the screen enclosure! Oh, yeah - just another relaxing 30 minutes here in paradise!

~~I used Dub's truck Friday to help a friend get ready for her yard sale. As I was leaving he said, "Don't be getting any scratches or dings on my fine truck!" We're talking about a 1985 Isuzu here folks! In lots of places only the paint is what's holding it together! It used to be silver but is now a lovely rust color with touches of grey here and there! It has OVER 220,000 miles on it. But it runs well and is darned dependable. As I leave my friends house, we both DID NOT notice at the same time a sheet metal screw completely embedded in the right front tire! I certainly DID NOT have to go home and tell Dub I broke his truck! Well, at least it was a slow leak and I really didn't have to change the tire - and he was able to plug it instead of buying a new tire!

~~I didn't take full advantage of my health insurance last week - with full knowledge that on March 1 I would no longer have coverage. I certainly didn't go get a check-up with my sweet doctor - and then did NOT call the pharmacy and ask them to please give me a refill on every prescription they possibly could! I would never try to take advantage of that poor insurance company like that.

~~It couldn't have been me who got sooooo excited when my Powerball ticket actually won a big $3.00 last week! I'd hate to see what might happen if I actually won a bunch of $$$$$!

On a much more serious note, please check out the Praying for Jonah site (see left sidebar). This family lost newborn Gabe last year and are now fighting to save days old Jonah. They need all the prayers and good thoughts they can get!

Comments - I love comments!! What haven't you done??

CAUTION - BRAGGING GRANDMOTHER

2009-02-27T12:09:00.000-05:00

Last weekend my granddaughters cheerleading squad won another competition! I know it's worth all the bruises and sore muscles, isn't it, MH!

Here she is supporting one of her team mates

That's my MH, second from left

The whole gang

Military Sense of Humor!

2009-02-25T00:15:00.000-05:00

I received these in an email the other day from one of my cousins. Just had to share them with ya. It's refreshing to see that in all the turmoil, our troops can maintain a sense of humor. Thanks, Donna and Bob for sharing with me!

One of the most valuable tools to have is your watch dog!

It is important to always make an effort to befriend your enemy. As the saying goes, "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer."

Every lady needs a convenient place to hang her hand bag!

Plan "A"

Plan "B"

This one is for the newer, smaller, secret aircraft carriers in development now!

New version of transportation for our dedicated ground troops!

Wonder if this would work?

Here comes the Cavalry!

Harry Potter finds new uses for the cloak of invisibility!

.. .. .. .. and for the broom!

I do have one more picture -- but it's PG13 rated and I hesitate to post it here on my 'family friendly' blog. If you would like me to e-mail it to you, leave your address in comments and I'll send it along! It's just a little nudity .. .. .. but I don't want to offend anyone!

Not Me! Monday!

2009-02-23T00:12:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I really had to give the subject some thought this week. Not because I don't have any Not Me's .. .. .. .. but because I may not have very many that I want to actually publish! Okay, here goes.

**Dub washed and waxed our SUV the other day. He did a beautiful job, as always .. .. .. when he asked me to come out and check to make sure I approved, I DID NOT immediately walk over, take the hem of my t-shirt and polish a little spot on the front fender - while saying, "WE did a great job, don't ya think!" Hey, I was baking a cake at the time and had the batter on my shirt to prove it! (Never mind that the batter got there when I was licking the bowl.) Anyway, polishing 2 square inches was HARD work!

**I did not take a three hour nap yesterday and then go to bed at 10pm! No, JB & Karen, I'm not sick - just really, really tired from polishing that fender, I guess!

**Since it was so beautiful and sunny out this afternoon, I refrained from going out and spraying down everything in the yard with Miracle Grow without checking what the weatherman had planned. It DID NOT pour down rain shortly after I finished!

**Oh - and just before I did my Miracle Grow fiasco, I had NOT hung a bunch of doggie and sugar glider blankets out on the line to dry in the fresh breeze. And I did NOT have to bring them all inside and run them through the dryer anyway, dammit!

That's enough! I'll leave the comments open for you - Would love to see some comments on what you didn't do!

A Good Deed!

2009-02-21T00:15:00.000-05:00

I've seen it all now!

I don't know about where you live, but around here most of the pre-teens and teenagers are a little on the rough side. Some are a LOT on the rough side. You don't often see many of the "good" kids out wandering the neighborhood. They are at one function or another - or studying - or home being ideal children.

This afternoon one of our elderly neighbors was trying to get a couch out his door by himself. Two of the rougher teenagers were walking past and noticed his struggle. They jogged up to the door, one climbed over the couch, they picked it up, angled it perfectly and got it onto the porch in no time. After a little discussion, the boys then carried it out to the gentleman's pickup truck, loaded it and tied it down very well.

When our neighbor pulled out his wallet and offered to pay the boys they both refused any payment, shook the man's hand and waved as they walked on down the street.

It took everything I had not to walk over and congratulate them for doing such a good deed - but was afraid if I made a big deal out of it, they might never do anything that nice again. So, when they passed my house, I just smiled and waved. And for the first time ever, they smiled and waved back!

Jail? For a Candle?

2009-02-18T23:38:00.000-05:00

Well, I hitched up the mules this morning and headed for the big city. Had to go by the hardware store, the bank, the feed store and .. .. .. .. who am I kidding! ! !

Actually, I got into my gas guzzling Jeep Grand Cherokee Limited (with leather seats) and cruised south a few miles to Home Depot to pick up some Kingsford and some fertilizer. Then hit the ATM for a cash refill. Stopped in at the pet shop for goodies for the ratters and the sugar glider. Finally made it to the grocery store - $78 for groceries to feed two people for about a week! Sheesh!

On the way back home, I noticed a sign saying that a store I like was having a moving sale! DETOUR!! I knew that those frozen goods in the back of the Jeep could stand the 82 degree heat for a few minutes while I just ran in a took a quick look.

They had Yankee Candles 50% off - with another 10% off if you paid cash . . . I now know why I hit that ATM earlier.

They were really, really crowded - and there were two grown women arguing very loudly over who grabbed a candle first! There were about 15 of us who just stepped back and watched as they kept yelling and pulling on one candle. An employee tried to settle the problem to no avail and stood right beside them and called the police! Yep, they were still screaming when two cops walked in a few minutes later. Each cop took hold of a woman, the employee grabbed the candle and all the fun was over, just that quick! It was one of those yummy Christmas Cookie candles that they were fighting over. But - guess what - another shopper pointed out to us all that there were about 6 or 7 more of them right in the bin! I don't think I'll ever understand people!

By the way - I did get myself 4 candles - and the groceries made it through the ordeal just fine. And, the store employee said that they were going to press charges - disturbing the peace - against the two fighters .. .. .. the cops actually took them to jail!

NOT ME MONDAY - Stuff I DID NOT Do!

2009-02-16T00:15:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

*No one in this house would be dumb enough to turn on the ceiling fan in the guest room and then proceed to stand up on the bed (trying to reach up to the top shelf in the closet) and manage to almost knock herself out. Nobody is that stoopid! Turn the fan on high - and then immediately stick her head in it!! No No No Not Me Never Ever .. .. .. why do I have this headache???

*The weather was so nice outside this morning that I went out in the front yard to pull more weeds out of my poor old flower beds. Barefoot. And just before starting back into the house I didn't notice that my heel was covered in .. .. .. um .. .. er .. .. kitty poop! And I did not yell for Dub to bring me the soap, the Lysol AND the alcohol and paper towels so I could clean that yuck off my poor foot! We DO NOT own a cat!

*Dub was sweet enough to make really yummy brownies Friday - and we did not consume the entire pan of said chewy brownies within 24 hours.

*I am certainly NOT trying really, really hard to lose some weight - and that's why I couldn't have participated in the brownie chow-down Friday and Saturday! I am wwaayy too dedicated to my diet to do something like that!

So - what haven't you done lately?

Sign, Sign - Everywhere a Sign

2009-02-14T20:27:00.000-05:00

I think most, if not all, of these signs are British . . . yes, our 'mother tongue'!

Now, if I were to say most of these things in my semi-redneck, southern drawl, I think most of them might sound kind of rude.

But with the proper British accent, they sound kind of dignified, I think!!

OR - maybe not!

Good dog, indeed - if he can read that!

sucked off?

DAYTONA 500 TIME!!

2009-02-11T00:05:00.000-05:00

For some reason, I still find myself getting excited as the new NASCAR racing season begins this week! It's like this every year. The closer we get to the Daytona 500, the higher the anticipation!

I was at the first Daytona 500. Actually, I was at the last two races that were held on the beach! I watched a lot of the construction of the Speedway, saw the testing - and was mesmerized by the speeds!

When people speak now of the history of NASCAR, they are usually talking about the 1970's. When I talk about history . . . I'm talking HISTORY! Red Byron, Eddie Pagan, Lee Petty, Johnny Beauchamp, Joe Weatherly, Elmo Langley, Tim Flock, Fireball Roberts, Buck Baker, Tiny Lund, Glen Wood, Herman Beam, Marvin Panch, and Curtis Turner.

There was at least one year that there were over 60 races for what is called Cup cars. That was before all the huge interstate highways, before the plush motor homes, before the fabulous tractor-trailer rigs, etc. That was when nobody had private planes to zip from track to track.!

One thing I can say is that those were some really wild times! Even though I was just a kid in the late 50's - I remember drivers racing rental cars (lovingly called u-wreck 'ems), in reverse from the speedway to the beach .. .. .. just to see who had to buy dinner!

Some of this "way back when" stuff makes me wonder how those guys ever made it . . . some of it makes me wonder just how crazy we all were to be involved in it . . . . some of it makes me really proud to be able to say I was there and was able to contribute in my own little, tiny way to what we see as NASCAR now!!

Got a question or comment about NASCAR ancient history? Leave it in comments and I'll do my best to answer for ya! I don't know it all - but I can make up a story just as good as those other guys!! ;-)

Not Me Monday! - February 9, 2009 Edition

2009-02-08T21:44:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

**This dedicated, hard working career woman DID NOT walk out of work Wednesday evening, telling the boss - I quit! Yikes!

**And I have not decided that I am officially retired! That’s it! I’m done! Not me!

**Nobody in this house is still getting a pretty good chuckle out of the picture over at mycharmingkids showing MckMama’s diapering skills on poor little Small Fry. We’re gonna have to teach her the finer skills of 200mph tape! (That’s duct tape to you Yankees out there!)

**I did not neglect my yard so far this winter. It is a beautiful, landscaped pride of the neighborhood. That’s why I couldn’t have possibly filled two big garbage cans with the weeds I pulled out of two flower beds Thursday and Friday (you know, since I didn’t have to work)!

**And I do not have to cut this short - since I hear a hot tub and a good book calling my name! Wow, I smile every time I think about it! Of course, my retirement isn’t going to cause us to find new inventive ways to cut the budget - MORE!

Now I've Done It!!

2009-02-06T12:09:00.000-05:00

Yep, I've done it now. It's all over. Can't be un-done. Can't be taken back.

I QUIT MY JOB!!

I am now officially retired.

I just didn't do it in exactly the traditional way.

In early April I'll be 62 and qualify for early retirement according to Social Security. I applied for Disability several months ago - because of COPD, arthritis, anxiety and miscellaneous other ailments. However, the COPD and working in an auto repair shop just don't mix well. The more exposure, the worse it got -- -- and did I mention the alcohol burning drag cars? Much as I LOVE those race cars, the fumes about took me out! So even if I can't get the disability, I'll at least get my regular retirement benefits!

But dang! Where's my gold watch? Where's my ticket for the 6 week trip to the tropics? Where's that fabulous retirement community I'm supposed to be living in?

Okay, the reality is that I stayed in my jammies all day Thursday and enjoyed every minute of it and this morning I went out and weeded a flower bed that was desperately in need of help. It's 2pm and I have the rest of the day to pamper myself with a little R&R and try to get my health back where it needs to be!

All I can say is - - - - Yikes! I'm retired!

Run - Zombies are coming! Raptors Ahead!

2009-02-04T19:31:00.000-05:00

I'm not sure if this makes me a little strange or not - but I really got a kick out of this article I saw this evening! Run for your life - the zombies are coming!

COLLINSVILLE, Ill. Pranksters in at least three states are messing with electronic road signs meant to warn motorists of possible traffic problems by putting drivers on notice about Nazi zombies and raptors. And highway safety officials aren't amused.

The latest breach came Tuesday during the morning rush hour near Collinsville, Ill., where hackers changed a sign along southbound Interstate 255 to read, "DAILY LANE CLOSURES DUE TO ZOMBIES."

A day earlier in Indiana's Hamilton County, the electronic message on a board in Carmel's construction zone warned drivers of "RAPTORS AHEAD CAUTION."

And signs in Austin, Texas, recently flashed: "NAZI ZOMBIES! RUN!!!" and "ZOMBIES IN AREA! RUN."

Officials in Illinois are concerned the rewritten signs distract motorists from heeding legitimate hazards down the road. The hacked sign on Tuesday originally warned drivers of crews replacing guardrails.

I can see humor in all of it - except that Nazi part . . . not funny at all! The article goes on to explain about sites where you can learn how to hack into these signs - and then discusses the HUGE fines for doing so!

IS IT NOT ME MONDAY AGAIN?

2009-02-02T01:15:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I absolutely did not just stand and watch as our two rat terriers decided they were going to dig a hole to China or die trying! It started with Dixie just kind of snooping around in this sandy patch next to the tomato plants - - then Rascal started sniffing - - then they moved a little sand around - - then it was a full-tilt dig, dig, dig! I just didn't have the heart to stop them cause they were obviously having such a great time!

And Dub didn't grab them as soon as they even thought about coming in the house . . . carried each to MY bath tub and gave them both complete head to little stubby tail shampoos!

And then he DIDN'T turn TWO really wet rat terriers loose in the house - yelling at me to dry them off!! Oh, no - none of that could happen here!

While reading Not Me's from someone who shall remain nameless (MckMama), I didn't almost choke at her fabulous diapering skills! Poor little Small Fry looks like she might just be a little over-padded!

That's it for me - - what didn't you do???

This and That!

2009-02-01T16:02:00.000-05:00

A lazy Sunday here. It's still cooler than usual. We actually had a light freeze the other night and the surface of everything died. My poor bananas will take a while to grow back. It had been so warm that lots of plants had already started new growth and we also had a lot of things in full bloom! Well - now it's all a lovely shade of brown.

And because we are in what they call our dry season, we now have a huge risk of wild fires. There was a little rain a few days ago - but not enough to fix the problem. So, we are all on alert - again!

Getting ready to the Super Bowl commercials. Well, if it's a good game - I'll really enjoy that, too. But it seems to me that the games are kind of lop sided a lot of times and really don't keep you that excited . . . so the commercials are a big draw! I'm already looking forward to Miller Lite - - I just love that beer delivery guy!

Germs? Cat Hair? Oh, My!

2009-01-31T00:15:00.000-05:00

So, here I sit on Friday night . . er . . Saturday morning - watching Monk on TV. I've seen it several times before, but never really paid much attention to it. (I'm one of those who almost always does something else while watching TV.)

Just watching that poor guy gives me the heebie jeebies. I'm just sayin', we all pretty much don't like germs and creepy crawlies too much. But poor old Monk is a full blown psych case! I guess it's good to see that there are other people out there who are worse off than I am!

I can just imagine him completely going nuts-o if he had a dog or cat! Think of it. One little cat hair would probably send him screaming into oblivion!

Only a few holidays for today . . . enjoy your Brussels Sprouts!

*Backwards Day - Are we supposed to walk backwards, or maybe just wear all our clothes backwards?
*Eat Brussels Sprouts Day - I know I'm weird . . . but I like Brussels Sprouts!
*Hell is freezing over Day - Nope, can't be yet. I haven't seen it accumulate snow in my front yard and that ain't gonna happen until hell freezes over!

I never saw a green one like that before!

2009-01-30T00:22:00.000-05:00

As a mother, you learn to tune out certain things when kids are outside playing. AND you learn to be on alert when you hear certain phrases. One of my least favorite is, "Hey, y’all - watch this!"

Now that I’m an empty nester, that phrase doesn’t get my nerves on edge nearly as much as it used to. But, you can still pick it out of the yelling of 10 kids all playing in the yard half way down the block! And you sort of hold your breath for a minute, and maybe check out the window just to make sure everything is okay.

On some occasions the, "Hey, y’all - watch this!", is just the first sign of trouble. The second sign is when most of those 10 kids scatter throughout the neighborhood back to their own yards. The third sign is when you hear the ambulance or see the Mom and/or Dad loading one or more kids into the car and taking off in a hurry.

Usually within a few hours, you hear the car doors slam and all the kids start wandering back to see what happened - like they weren’t eye witnesses in the first place. Yep, they all confirm that the front wheel on Billy’s bike just couldn’t take that big jump they built in the front yard!

"Yeah, but did you see that cool cast he got on his arm! I never saw a green one like that before!"

Let’s all give our answering machines a hug today! Or have we ALL switched to voicemail and sold the old machine on eBay?

*Snagglepuss's Birthday - One of the HANNA-BARBERA (Yogi Bear) gang of great cartoon characters!
*Yodel for Your Neighbors Day - Gosh, where has the age-old art of yodeling gone?
*Franklin D. Roosevelt's Birthday (Born 1882) - One of my brothers has Franklin for a middle name because he was born on the same day that FDR died.
*National Inane Answering Machine Message Day - Get rid of that plain old "leave a message" message. Put something interesting, quick and funny on there! I have a friend who uses, "You have reached the IRS, leave your name and social security number if you would like a free personal audit!"

Celebrate Your Corn Chips Today!

2009-01-29T13:14:00.000-05:00

Here are our celebrations for today!
*Carnation Day - Don’t you just love their scent! Any color, any time - carnations are second only to the rose!
*National Puzzle Day - Sure, take a puzzle to work and spend the day doing it instead of your job! I bet your replacement won’t try that January 29, 2010!
*Free Thinkers Day - Let your mind go - think outside the box! Use your valuable freedoms to just let your brain run amok!
*Seeing Eye Guide Dog Birthday 1929 - A wonderful thing! Gives so much freedom to those who would otherwise be SO restricted.
*National Corn Chip Day - Long live the Frito Bandito! For those too young to know, the Frito Bandito was a Mexican-ish Bandit who (in the Frito commercials) would find sneaky ways to steal your Fritos! Someone complained that it made Mexican bandits look bad - so they pulled all the commercials from the air! I thought he was kind of cute!

Hutton & Hutton & Daisies

2009-01-28T11:54:00.000-05:00

About a zillion years ago (mid-70's) I used to watch a TV mystery, "Ellery Queen", with James Hutton playing the title role of the famous sleuth. I really enjoyed it and actually read the books after watching it on TV.

Then about ten years later I discovered his son, Timothy Hutton, in Turk 182. If you have seen this film (and remember it) I hope you share my opinion that it’s really good. One of those where pretty bad things happen to some really nice people, but the good guys win in the end. The critics hated it. What makes Turk 182 so enjoyable is getting there! The character just has a way that wins you over. He may be breaking the law and causing all kinds of havoc and you sit there cheering him on - almost wishing you could jump in and help! Some of the stunts he pulls to lure in the bad guys are just classics!

Now, on TNT, we have LEVERAGE - starring Timothy Hutton. I think I’ll put this one on my list of shows to watch all season! He’s a bad guy that does good! Not exactly Robin Hood - but he and his gang are fun to watch as they "out dirty" the bad guys! Give it a try. It may not be for everyone, but I really, really like the escape it gives me from the real world!

Okay, make a pop art daisy chain while you eat your blueberry pancakes. Then you and Ernie can take the bubble wrap off your kazoos and play us a tune!

*Daisy Day - I love daisies . . . they don’t smell particularly good, but they just look so happy and bright!
*Pop Art Day - Back "in the day" Pop Art was all the rage. Now, people collect it as antiques!
*National Blueberry Pancake Day - Just one more excuse to have breakfast for dinner! It’s too late to fix ‘em for this morning - so have them tonight!
*Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day - Don’t ya just love to make everyone around you NUTS by popping every possible little bubble on that piece of wrap!
*Sesame Street's Ernie's Birthday - Anybody from Sesame Street deserves a full-blown holiday - not just a little mention like this!
*National Kazoo Day - Get out your Kazoo and make the few sane people left from the bubble wrap incident run screaming from the building!

Technology really can be fun!

2009-01-27T13:11:00.000-05:00

Have you seen those digital picture frames that have been in the stores for a while. While I will admit that there was a time when I would have rushed out to buy one immediately just because it was the latest ‘thing’, I no longer do that. I don’t even have an I-Pod (my, how I suffer)! They always seemed a little pricey for just a picture frame.

My son and his lovely Karen gave me an 8" Widescreen Digital Picture Frame for Christmas - - - absolutely LOADED with pictures of my wonderful grand kids and plenty of room for more!

This thing is great! Of course, being technically challenged, I had not plugged it in when my son called to see if I liked it. I told him I hadn’t read the instructions yet to see how to put the pictures in off of my computer. Then he said just to plug it in! A miracle! Right there, my own private slide show of my favorite folks!

So - if the opportunity presents itself and you haven’t already grabbed one off the shelf, go for it! These things are WONDERFUL!

What ya wanna celebrate?
*National Toilet Day / Thomas Crapper Day - There is some debate on whether Thomas Crapper really invented toilets (as we know them) . . . I don’t care who did it - I’m just really, really glad they did!
*Mad Tea Party Day - Alice in Wonderland is a great story and the Mad Tea Party was such a good time - couldn’t be done in this day and time without a police raid!
*Fun at Work Day - I’m sure there are jobs where this might apply - but right now, mine is not one of them . . . . used to be . . . may be again one day . . . not now! Bummer!

Not Me! Monday!

2009-01-26T12:18:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

I am not totally jealous of MckMama, PC and Stellan being out there on the open seas.

I did not secretly wish that my step-daughter would quit calling about her pig butchering session last week.

When hubby made a pan of Hershey's double chocolate brownies last week, I did not nibble my way through half the pan in one evening! Not ME!

I didn't almost choke on my scrambled eggs this morning when I saw on the news that the infamous Illinois governor was considering Oprah for President Obama's empty Senate seat! He may be crazier than me! She'd be nuts to give up what she's got to go into government!

Here's our celebrations for today:

Television's Birthday - what would we do without good ol' TV?

Clashing Clothes Day - um - well, that's most days for me! I'm such a fashionista!

National Peanut Brittle Day - Better skip this one until they figure out the recent health scare!

Disneyland Founded (Groundbreaking in 1954) - I actually got to go to Disneyland during the first year it was open! Of course, I was only a wee babe at the time!

It's National Opposite Day!!

2009-01-25T15:15:00.000-05:00

A flu bug is kicking me in the head today - so you guys are gonna have to celebrate for me - back tomorrow with our regular "Not Me - Monday" . . .

National Opposite Day
A Room Of One's Own Day
National Compliment Day
101 Dalmatian's Birthday (1961)

LORI, DUB & THE PIG!

2009-01-24T15:06:00.000-05:00

I have this step-daughter, Lori - who lives in Middle-Of-Nowhere, Georgia. She, her husband M, son Dub (11) and daughter Gee (5) have a little semi-farm. M owns an insurance/tax business to pay all the expenses for this little farming venture!

Not a day goes by that there isn’t some new adventure (could be interpreted as CRISIS)! On this chunk of land they are raising wild turkeys, several varieties of chickens, guinea hens, wild boar, domestic hogs, goats - both standards and pygmies and rabbits. Of course, there is the usual dog and uncountable cats!

Friday’s adventure (CRISIS) involves killing and dressing a hog for a "pig pickin" on Sunday. Lori and Dub will be the only characters directly involved. Gee will be ‘stupidvising’ from the sidelines and my hubby will be assisting by phone.

Keep in mind that Lori is a petite 5'2" (in heels) and might weigh 100. She’s tiny, but will get a job done when she sets her mind to it.

Phone call #1 - Daddy, how do I kill this pig? Just shoot it between the eyes, then cut its throat and use the wench to hang it from the tree limb. OK - bye!

Phone call #2 - Daddy, Dub shot it and cut its throat. Then we got it hanging okay. I think we want to scrape it instead of skinning it - what’s the easiest way to scrape it. (Gee in the background can be heard begging to help scrape.) Pour hot water all over it and just start to scrape. If it gets real cool and harder to work with, use more hot water. Ok - bye!

Phone call #3 - Daddy, we cut it open! I think I missed a step somewhere . . . I got pig poop all over the place. We went ahead and got everything out and washed it out really carefully! How do I NOT do that again? (I will not go into Daddy’s explanation of this - let’s just say he taught her preventive measures.) Well, it’s not like I’m gonna make chitlins’s (Southern for chitterlings) or anything. Bye!

Phone calls #4, 5 & 6 - All involve various stages of pig dismemberment - I did my best not to listen. At one point Gee had the garden limb cutters asking if she could help!

Phone call #7 - Surprise, this time it’s M - he’s on his way home from work and has just found out that his wife and children have been enjoying a evening of pig anatomy!

Phone call #8 - We have started answering the phone "Butcher’s Helper" - Daddy, we got SEVENTY POUNDS out of that pig! We didn’t even save all the fat and everything for sausage! I had no idea it was that heavy!

Ah! The leisure life on a gentleman’s farm!

UPDATE! Lori just called again . . . yep, one of the goats is giving birth! Right Now! She'll call us back with progress reports!

Get The Celebrating Going!

Just Do It Day - Don't hesitate, don't procrastinate - jump in there with both feet and JUST DO IT!

Eskimo Pie - I do LOVE an Eskimo Pie

National Speak Up and Succeed Day - Not sure I have the energy for this today, but if the opportunity presents itself, I'll JUST DO IT!

Snowplow Mailbox Hockey Days!

2009-01-23T08:19:00.000-05:00

Measure Your Feet Day - Huh? I'm not sure I want to get that personal with my feet!
National Handwriting Day - That's probably everywhere except Flori-duh, where someone has suggested that we eliminate teaching cursive as a budget cutting measure.
Snowplow Mailbox Hockey Days - I think maybe this is a Northern sport!
Better Business Communication Day - Fridays are good for this . . . everyone is in a good mood on Friday.
Pie Day - This is eat a pie day. It is not throw a pie in someones face day.
Compliment Day -- say nice things to everyone you meet!
Spouse's Day - make this day special for your spouse.

Dogs & Cats and the ways they love!

2009-01-22T10:54:00.000-05:00

When you've been gone for 5 minutes or 15 hours, your dog will great you with barks, tail wagging sniffing and general air of well being. Love me, pat me, hold me - make sure I know you care! Let me check you out. You will be licked from top to toe, just to make sure everything is okay.

On the other hand, the cat - not caring if you,ve been gone 5 minutes or 6 months (as long as food and water were available) may or may not acknowledge that you have arrived. You may get a flick of the tail. And in extreme cases of excitement, you may be invited to actually touch the feline for a moment.

The dog is so thankful that you chose him to come live in this beautiful home with you and is eager to please you in any way he can. The cat will tolerate you and your family living in his house - but expects you to remember the boundries established early in your relationship. He is in charge of this estate and it is your goal in life to maintain his happiness at all times.

Let's Celebrate

Is it possible that we can take all of the celebrations for today and roll them into one? I think we can make that happen!

Still half asleep, you step out on the porch to get the morning paper. You come in from the cold and shuffle to the kitchen. A nice warm cup of coffee awaits with your blond brownie. Put on your best polka dot outfit and head down town to join the crowds happily sharing celebration of life day! Once you get back home, you then must answer all those questions from your cat about where you've been and why you left home before feeding him!

Celebration of Life Day
National Polka Dot Day
Come in from the cold Day
National Blond Brownie Day
Answer Your Cat's Question Day

What's a BLOG??

2009-01-20T21:42:00.000-05:00

This post is for Wednesday, January 21, 2009!

I've been reading various blogs for quite a while. Some are really silly. Some are just plain dumb. There are people who - when they get older - are going to look back and be amazed that they actually did that! Some are so filled with hate that you just hope that the author is getting daily medications!

But here's the plus side . . . and boy is it a HUGE plus! Do you have a problem? Need advice? Need prayers? All ya have to do is get in touch with someone who has a popular blog. Virtually overnight, these cyber warriors can 'muster the troops' and have prayers, advice and emotional support that you would never believe!

This is the best use of 'surfing the net' that I've ever seen! And it is used as a true network. If one blog says something about a big problem . . . another blog will pick it up, then another and so on until it's all over the world.

Are you really tired of reading nothing but gloom and doom in your daily newspaper? Is television news giving you nightmares? Well, just dig around in a few blogs and you are bound to find some great places to spend some time.

I love the fact that you can say what you feel - share it with the world - and it's all FREE. You can see what people all over the world have to say on most any subject - and it's all FREE.

If you don't follow any particular blog regularly - you're missing out! It's like having your own private soap opera - except everything is real! Yes, that couple DID have four kids and then adopt six more - and they have time to blog about it! More fun than watching most gunk on TV! You'll be driving home from work and wonder how little Susie did on her math test today . . . no, not your daughter - the one on Susie's Mama's Blog!

So - get yourself a blog - link up with a few others who have similar interests - and your off and running in the cyber soap opera world of good news, good deeds and some of the best reading I've done in years!

And then you can celebrate these special holidays today!!

Squirrel Appreciation Day - Make sure you get out there and appreciate a squirrel today! Any of these certainly look worthy of appreciation! You might kind of watch the one with the banjo. Looks like maybe he saw "Deliverance" too many times!

Women's Healthy Weight Day - At least today doesn't have any fattening food to appreciate like most days do! And what's up with the pallet scale? Okay, I'm a little chubby - but that's over-kill!
National Hugging Day - It's said that hugs can cure what ails ya! I don't know about that - but I do know that they sure do feel good!

Speaking of Karen!

2009-01-20T02:36:00.000-05:00

Speaking of Karen, my daughter-in-law (in pink) . . . . yes, I was just speaking of her in yesterdays Not Me's.

What a gal!

If I had a daughter, I think I'd be really proud if she turned out just like Karen! Here's just a few reasons I love her . . . .

She's smart - smart enough to keep just one step ahead of JB and the kids!
She has a wicked sense of humor! And a quick wit! She can get ya with a comeback so fast you don't even know you've been hit!
The house always looks great! She has that touch - I think it came from her Grandmother - with little effort and lots of energy she can make a room warm and inviting!
She loves Larry!
I love her taste in clothes - something I have no talent with at all!
She's a terrific mother and a great mommy! That's hard to do. Both Pickle and MH have perfect manners - and use them almost always!
JB loves her more than she'll ever know.
I love her more than she'll ever know.
She has brought religion into JB's life - which I neglected when he was a child.
My grandchildren are being raised in the Church!
She's a good sport. Will give almost anything a try . . . . unless it really, really looks dangerous!
Little by little she is getting used to seeing things like JB and Pickle up on the roof of the shed. That didn't cause a full blown heart attack - only a mild case of the 'vapors'!
When she knows someone is really in trouble, she will give up something she has been saving for - and help them out.
She's a really great present picker-outer!
She is beautiful - has that glow!
She has that soft, swingy 'rich girl' hair that I would have killed for in my youth!

All that - and she's a great cook, too!

I could go on for hours - but I won't. These are just some things I don't think I've ever told her. And she knows me well. I could never say these things without crying like a baby. Yep, I'm the emotional one in the family!

Karen, when I say I have perfect grand kids - I MEAN IT. When I say I love you - I MEAN IT. When I say you and JB are great together - I MEAN IT.

Have a wonderful week - I miss you guys - give each other a hug for me!

The Other Momma

And the celebrations for today:

Cheese Day - Not just in Wisconsin, but throughout the country - make sure you chow down on some cheese today
Inauguration Day - It's a new year, new president and hopefully a completely new attitude. I know we all hope this will be a turning point toward better times!
National Buttercrunch Day - Oh, boy - something fattening with absolutely no nutritional value whatsoever!

NOT ME MONDAY - Stuff I DID NOT Do!

2009-01-19T00:03:00.000-05:00

Join us for another episode of Not Me Monday! Compliments of www.mycharmingkids.net

I absolutely did NOT get all weepy when I saw the picture on the right on my daughter's blog (okay, she's my daughter-in-law - but she's the closest thing to a daughter I'll ever have)! Saturday night was Daddy / Daughter Dance night at school and what man in his right mind could pass up a date with someone looking THAT good! Of course, my little boy, JB, is looking good, too!

While at the pet shop to buy Pig Earz for the ratters, I surely didn't fall completely in love with these two tiny, cute little kitties that were nothing but purr machines! Hubby was there and drug me out kittenless!

The date today is January 19, 2009, right? Well, I ABSOLUTELY DID NOT take down the last of the CHRISTmas decorations (including the tree) yesterday afternoon. Except for that sign that says, "Be Bad - Save Santa A Trip!" Okay, I'll probably leave up the wood carving of a sleepy Santa that says, "HoHo Hummmm", too!

I had to get up early one morning last week to meet with our CPA - working on the Corporate taxes! Yep, alarm went off, got dressed, grabbed my toaster pop-up and headed out the door - when I remembered . . . . . . the darned meeting was scheduled for the NEXT morning! Nope, that wasn't me. Honest, Boss, you can trust me with all your financial goings on!

Celebrate - Celebrate - Dance to the Music!

Hat Day - I wonder if this is plain old normal hat - or silly hats? Like a tall, black pointy one?
Tin Can Day - Patented in 1810, how could we live without tin cans? You could maybe put some kind of potion in one (do I see a theme developing?)
New Friends Day - Go out and make a new friend today. But, be careful. You don't want to be too aggressive and have folks think you're a stalker or something. If you should get arrested, email us and we'll come post your bail! You could make a potion to help attract friends if you're really un-likable!
Brew A Potion Day - DO NOT brew Love Potion #9 and then try to make a New Friend. I'm pretty sure that you will end up being arrested and it will take lots of us pooling our $$$$$ together to come up with enough to get you out on charges like that!
International Sing-Out Day - and don't be singing-out when you try out that potion!
Get to Know Your Customers Day - and don't use it on customers - business is bad enough without you experimenting on our loyal customers. Well, it might not hurt to try that one that none of us like - - you know who I mean!
National Penguin Awareness Day - No potion experiments on penguins, either. That's animal cruelty and will get you put UNDER the jailhouse - no bail - no trial - just your new BFF, Bubba, to 'show you the ropes'!

IT'S WINNIE THE POOH DAY!

2009-01-18T12:42:00.000-05:00

Come meet the gang! Well, I guess you can hardly call this little group a 'gang' even using the loosest of terms.

Here we have Christopher Robin, who the stories were written for, watching Owl come in for a landing. Next is Tigger with his bouncing tail - he's the only one, you know. And Eeyore - poor Eeyore - seems nothing ever works exactly right for him. Always has a rainy cloud in his vicinity.

Then is the perfect mother Kanga with her lovely daughter Roo. This is ever-so-pink Piglet who is so child-like in his innocence. And finally Winnie the Pooh - The specialist bear in the world (although Paddington is a very close 2nd.)! He has the most vivid imagination . . . just seems like so many ideas just - don't - quite - work - exactly - the - way - they - were - planned!

Yes, that wonderful icon of childhood - and all his friends! How can anyone NOT fall in love with them? I've always wanted to visit the 100 Acre Wood and have a spot of tea and honey with Christopher Robin and his associates!

TTFN!

Pets, Pets, Pests?

2009-01-17T14:51:00.000-05:00

I do LOVE pets. We currently have the two rat terriers and one adorable sugar glider. Everyone thinks that's quite enough. Everyone except ME! I read the classified ads every day to see what new critters are available 'round here.

Before we went to the grocery store today, we stopped in at the pet shop to see what's new and to pick up some pig ears for the hounds and fruit for Niblet.

I spent about 30 minutes wandering around looking at all the cute doggie clothes, clowning around with the ferrets and hugging the hamsters! I tickled bunnie ears and talked with lots of birds - I just wanted to tell them to pack up a pair of each of them for me to take home!

Then they really did it! Here comes the SPCA with puppies and kitties! Oh, no! Not puppies! And kitties! Even the ugliest of them are just sooooo danged cute! I could have hugged, petted and cuddled those little guys all afternoon!

One of these days I'm gonna get one of those little, tiny puppies that weighs 3 pounds full grown. She will have tons of silly shirts and hats to wear, too! And I want one of those 'munchkin' kittens. They have little bitty short legs - and are a little more compact than standard kitties. They call 'em "rug huggers"! Maybe I'll get one of those hairless ones, too! They always look so regal. Kind of like all the rest of us are here on earth for no other reason except to serve them!

Then we get home and Dixie and Rascal get all put out 'cause they smell all the puppy and kitten kisses! They moped around like they had lost their only friend on earth - - until I took a shower and changed clothes. Wow, what a difference. Now I'm their best friend again and they have decided it's okay to sit on the couch with me and pretend I'm one of the pack!

Before the shower I reached in Niblet's cage - he leaped onto my arm, ran up to my shoulder and starter searching . . . . 'where's my worm' . . . 'where's my pecan' . . . 'how about a walnut' . . . so I gave him a worm, he clicked his approval, ate the worm and jumped back into his cage and immediately went back to sleep!

Maybe I'll wait a little while before I bring home another pet!

Plenty of things to celebrate - or think about - today!

2009-01-17T10:37:00.000-05:00

A Friend Picks You Up Day - Does this mean that your friend calls and tells you a joke, or that this friend actually drives over to your house, picks you up and takes you somewhere?
Shari Lewis' Birthday Born in 1934 - You've gotta be pretty old to remember Lamb Chop and Charlie Horse!
Cable Car Day (patented 1871) - Who had cable cars besides San Francisco?
Learn to Ski Day - I do hope this is intended for snow skiing . . . as bad as the weather has been lately, I think water skiing is pretty much out of the question for most of the country!
Hot and Spicy Food International Day - As I said yesterday, we have a controversy! Is it a massive conspiracy? How did Hot and Spicy Food manage to get two days in a row? Just how many calendar professionals had to be paid off? Should Cool and Mild Food be concerned?
Professional Boxers Day - aka be nice to people with broken noses day!
Ben Franklin's Birthday Born in 1706 - Just how did Mr. Franklin accomplish so many things way back when travel was so difficult, technology was non-existent, and there was no 'ground work' laid for him to start with? Absolutely amazing! Of course, if you do enough reading about him you will find that there we some folks who thought he was more than a little strange!
Popeye's Birthday (1929) - Speaking of strange?! Eat a can of spinach and the entire contents of the can goes straight to the arm he's going to hit someone with. Bluto? Does anger management come to mind? Olive, the girl friend - obviously has serious anorexia problems. Poor old Wimpy always wanting someone to buy him a burger - that he will pay for on Tuesday. And that little unfortunate baby - was it Schmoo? What was the deal with that poor thing? Boy, that whole group would never pass the politically correct test these days, would they?

It's Friday - and Other Reasons to Have Fun Today!!

2009-01-16T09:23:00.000-05:00

National Nothing Day - I'm not sure what this is all about, but since it's nothing I'll just ignore it and it will go away!
National Religious Freedom Day - One of the most important days we have to celebrate! Thanks to all those who worked so hard before us to give us this freedom.
National Good Teen Day (Founded by an Ohio school teacher, this day has been approved by Congress.) - Seems that it is getting harder to find the good ones, but they are out there. The media makes sure we all know about the bad ones - we have to find the good ones on our own.
U.S. Prohibition Day - Just one more reason to enjoy another hot toddy!
National Fig Newton Day - I do like a fresh Fig Newton.
Hat Day (Third Friday in January.) - Let's all wear a silly hat today . . . bring a giggle to your fellow humans!
International Hot & Spicy Food Day - There is a little controversy here. Some celebrate this on the 16th and some on the 17th. I say (in the spirit of fairness) that we do both!

Three Reasons to Celebrate January 15!

2009-01-15T10:50:00.000-05:00

National Fresh Squeezed Juice Day - So get out there and find something to squeeze some juice out of!

Super Bowl Birthday (1967) - Or, as I like to call it, the great commercial premier day!

Krusty the Clown's Birthday (1989) - What better icon to build a celebration around?!

CAUTION - BRAGGING GRANDMOTHER

2009-01-14T20:06:00.000-05:00

Not that I would ever brag about a grandchild of mine, BUT this blond one with the snake around his neck just made the Principal's Honor Roll for the umpteenth time! His parents have pledged $50 each time Pickle reaches that lofty goal - and they are officially going broke!
I must add that he sure cleans up very nicely, too!

Keep it up, Pickle! Grampaw and I are so proud of you!

Wordless Wednesday & More Reasons to Celebrate

2009-01-14T09:36:00.000-05:00

I'm not sure if this is art - or if these people have WAY too much time on their hands! I might have to try that bread thing!

Let's Celebrate!

Bald Eagle Appreciation Days - Make sure your bald eagle knows you love him/her!

National Clean off your Desk Day - Just look at that mess! Clean it up before you go out to play!

National Hot Pastrami Sandwich Day - Can I have turkey instead?

National Dress Up Your Pet Day - I don't know about your pets, but my rat terriers and sugar glider HATE to play dress-up! They rip off anything that looks like clothes!